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My Filipina wife is submissive?


Is the submissive Filipina a myth?  

152 members have voted

  1. 1. This poll is about your Filipina wife.

    • My Filipina wife is submissive.
      35
    • We talk and make decisions together.
      81
    • My Filipina wife is stubborn and does not listen.
      37


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I want to settle the question of the legendary submissive Filipina. Is she for real or just a myth? There are two different polls. Please just respond to the one that fits you, unless you have both a wife and a girlfriend then respond to both polls.

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Why put a negative label like 'submissive' on something that is perfect? A western women's word used to threaten the 'competition'? Filipinas rule in love, understanding, commitment and patience wi

I think that is the key. I'm not quite married yet, but there are times when my fiancee' says, "I can do that for you." or "I will do that for you." and the things she is talking about doing for me w

THIS IS JUST MY OPINION NOT NECESSARILY FACT. I believe, because divorce is not legal in most cases in the Philippines, that Filipinas are raised seeing that the wife does whatever it takes to keep t

twostrokes

How about 2 & 3 as answers together....We talk about it and make a decision. If it is the one she wants, that is the end of it. If it isn't she gets stubborn and does not listen...hehe

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I want to settle the question of the legendary submissive Filipina. Is she for real or just a myth? There are two different polls. Please just respond to the one that fits you, unless you have both a wife and a girlfriend then respond to both polls.

 

One of the biggest myths I've encountered, any westerner wanting a relationship with a Filipina because they think the "the little lady" will be "submissive" has just made their first mistake.

 

However, "long suffering" is a quality I've seen, I guess it's a requirement given the lack of responsibility so many Filipino males exhibit.

 

As I'm well aware this is all generalisation, your mileage may vary.

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How about 2 & 3 as answers together....We talk about it and make a decision. If it is the one she wants, that is the end of it. If it isn't she gets stubborn and does not listen...hehe

 

i like your answer!hehehe. it reminds me of my boyfriend. when we we're in bohol riding a motorcycle he got too sweat and i ask him to let me wipe his back and put a small towel on it but he refused it. and then i pretended that i am mad and didn't listen when he tried to talk to me. few minutes later, he got the towel and and wipe his back and he said, if i don't do this you will tell me i am stubborn and will get mad at me so til now maam you are my boss! hahaha.

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cagayanstar
i like your answer!hehehe. it reminds me of my boyfriend. when we we're in bohol riding a motorcycle he got too sweat and i ask him to let me wipe his back and put a small towel on it but he refused it. and then i pretended that i am mad and didn't listen when he tried to talk to me. few minutes later, he got the towel and and wipe his back and he said, if i don't do this you will tell me i am stubborn and will get mad at me so til now maam you are my boss! hahaha.

 

 

Hmmmmmm...the Norwegian guy? :cool_01:

 

Wives are submissive as long as their husbands are treating them right.

But if they don't maybe something is wrong with the relationship.

If she starts being stubborn and hard headed, and keep saying no time to sit down and talk.

Assessing what's wrong.

Edited by cagayanstar
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What Missy says is very true. Especially about the Norwegian. :wt-hell:

 

Now seriously, submissive is such a relative term. If two people are mutually respectful and there is a common ground of give and take, then submissive is as natural as flowing water, on either ones part.

 

Then there is the simple girl from the province who has no idea how to navigate the world of the foreigner. So she is quite submissive because she has little knowledge to be able to make a stand against a foreigner. BUT she will learn, mark my word.

 

It boils down to education and upbringing coupled with baser instincts in her personality. If you treat a woman with respect and love, she will most likely be submissive because she trusts you. Trust is a KEY factor

Edited by Bob Ward
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Hmmmmmm...the Norwegian guy? :wt-hell:

 

Wives are submissive as long as their husbands are treating them right.

But if they don't maybe something is wrong with the relationship.

If she starts being stubborn and hard headed, and keep saying no time to sit down and talk.

Assessing what's wrong.

 

yes the Norwegian guy :D well, i am just doing my part as his girlfriend taking care of him like a baby but he is shy of that when people see me wiping his sweaty back and face. hehehe. back to the topic, i am one of the submissive girlfriend/wife (to be maybe sooner) my boyfriend can attest that. :P:wink:

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The Mason
I want to settle the question of the legendary submissive Filipina. Is she for real or just a myth? There are two different polls. Please just respond to the one that fits you, unless you have both a wife and a girlfriend then respond to both polls.

 

I think submissive is the wrong word here, it has too many negative connontations. I think a better question would have been, is your wife deferential? My wife is not a submissive woman, but she does defer to my judgement on many matters. When it comes to running the household, she is definitely in charge and does not even ask my opinion, let alone defer to it. However, when it comes to other matters such as where and how we'll live, she does defer to me.

 

I think if you want a woman that will respect you and adhere to more traditional gender roles, most Filipinas fit that description. If you want a submissive woman that will simply do as she's told, I don't think the average Filipina is the right woman for that.

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cagayanstar
yes the Norwegian guy :D well, i am just doing my part as his girlfriend taking care of him like a baby but he is shy of that when people see me wiping his sweaty back and face. hehehe. back to the topic, i am one of the submissive girlfriend/wife (to be maybe sooner) my boyfriend can attest that. :P:wink:

 

 

Seems a typical Filipina way of showing care though.

 

I am having headaches. :wt-hell:

Edited by cagayanstar
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broden

my wife and i have a fairly old fashioned relationship .. we discuss things .. but not everything .. i know her wants and wishes and she generally looks to me to make final decisions .. but it depends on the topic too.. i just bought a car .. we both drive it i know what the family needs .. she didn't know what i was going to buy untill i brought it home .. she's fully in charge of what schools our boy will go to .. we more often then not but not always will shop for appliances together but there have been times when i just went out a bought something we needed our last washer and dryer come to mind .. i could probably go on about a hundred different things i mean she's in charge of laundry cooking (but we both like to cook so i mean the every day day to day cooking) we do our biweekly shopping together she buys whatever stuff we need like clothes and what not

 

basically i guess you can say i am in charge of making our house and my family safe and secure and she is in charge of making our house a home and the three of us a family ..

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There needs to be an option for 1 and 2 both. We talk about it and if we don't make come to a decision, then my decision stands. As she says, well if it turns out to be a bad decision, at least you can't blame me. :wt-hell:

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Wives are submissive as long as their husbands are treating them right.

 

PLUS

 

Trust is a KEY factor

 

= TRUTH

 

If you treat your filipina right and don't break her trust in you, then she will follow you to the end of the earth.

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  • 4 weeks later...

I am a Fillipina who has llived in Oz for almost 30 years now. In the late 70s and much of the 80s, when the mail order bride thing was a big deal, the selling point of Introduction Agencies were that Filipinas are submissive women. Many Aussies must have fallen for this myth because Filipinas are still coming to Oz in droves. As for the submissive part, I definitely did not witness those. If anything most of the Filipinas I knew and met are the "dominant" partner in the marriage. I've only ever witnessed one (a friend of mine) who knelt down on her husband - but only to take his shoes off!

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Nice first post Christine and welcome to the forum.

 

As you say the the word "submissive" describes the old fashioned view of filipinas by western men. My filipina wife has been in oz for 23 years and has what I call a passive/aggresssive personality. She is strong willed and incredibly cool in most situations. But watch out if you piss her off. She is caring and loving but for sure an equal partner in our relationship. I wouldn't want it any other way. I have read advice on this forum about keeping your filipina in the Phils so she doesn't become westernised. Living in oz, my wife has grown to become a wonderful independent working wife and mum with friends of all different nationalities and professions. In my view, guys seeking a submissive partner must be very insecure.

Edited by loosehead
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