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Poll: support family? How much?


How much support?  

104 members have voted

  1. 1. How much do you contribute

    • You crazy? I give nothing.
      11
    • Only help in emergencies.
      35
    • 0-999 piso per month
      3
    • 1000 to 4999 piso per month
      24
    • 5000 to 9999 piso per month
      13
    • Over 10000 piso per month
      13
    • They support me!!!
      5


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Borinquen

I help pay my fiancee's youngest sister's tuition. Roughly 30,000P per year, i'm sure there are other costs, but i don't ask, just give 15,000P each of the 2 semesters. I do give my lady an allowance of sorts, if she decides to give to family, that's all her. Plus she makes and sells dresses online, i'm sure she gives from that income as well, i never asked. I just feel education is priceless and her sister is smart enough to succeed in the future.

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Being a filipino my self I was brought up to help in any way i can (family) Family is priceless Some say its a culture thing I say how can you put a price on a family? If you love someone you mu

My FIL and brother in law supported us while we got things going years ago. Now FIL is over 80, and unable to work, or even think straight. It doesn't bother me a bit to help him now. We normally give

Bottom line is, we give WAY too much, and it is NOT appreciated.

mikewright

My wife was supporting members of her family way before I met her.  Her first pay cheque went towards buying her parents a lounge and she's been supporting family members ever since.

 

With two of us working, we have been able to support her family over the years, mainly with housing, medical and education expenses.  But rather than just sending money, she sets up small businesses for them, small piggeries, multicabs, a truck, a jeepney at one stage, a rice farm, all things which provide the family with a sustainable income. With the multicabs, for example, she made sure that  part of the weekly take was put aside for repairs and maintenance and to eventually replace them when they wore out. The rice farm gives a steady income to the family.  It's not a hand out, they work for the income, and the income is sustainable.

 

The main thing is, it's what my wife wants to do, it makes her happy. And a happy wife means a happy life :)

 

Our main support in recent years has been for education, sponsoring nephews and nieces to study at University in Australia.  Again, that's more of a loan, not a hand-out, because they repay the fees when they graduate and start working full time.

 

Works for us.

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I voted in the P1000.00 per month bracket but we do not give pesos anymore. Used to give a lot for tuition, they graduated two police and one a nurse. The nurse does not even work now. House wife. We live with mother in law, one niece. and wife's brother who wiggle himself in. MIL is 83 yrs. old. Does not even seem appreciative as she always say she want to go back to her house. A run down termite eaten place. Actually went there for one week and had to come back to our house. At our house we have all modern convenience. We supply all the food, pay all utility bills and do not ask or take any moneys from them. So it cost maybe about P6000,00 or more for their living expenses per month.

When mother dies, maybe in five yrs. or less then the living arrangement concerning the BIL will change. 

We help in medical emergencies when needed. During holiday times we pay for all the food and drinks. If we travel out of town we pay all expenses. No one would offer to pay anything. Reach the point now  where we do not even take them or let anyone knows before we travel anywhere. If let them the whole family will want to tag along for free.

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RogerDuMond

does anyone support family back in their home country or is that considered anti cultural

 

Stay on topic please or start your own.

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RedKing

We send about $5K pesos per month mostly for internet so wife can stay in touch from California and and help with things like electricity bill.

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darrener

I voted up to 1000 P. usually get FIL to run a few errands and give him money for petrol....some times will buy some food if things are really tight for any of them...... or get them to come and eat dinner with us as they all live reasonably close, there is no agreement in place for any set amount.... and we would not do that, it just depends on who has been working during any particular month as work can be fairly scarce where we are......

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bargeman

I support as much as the others.

 

MIL needed help with medicine, wife said we will split 4 ways (each child pays equal share).

 

I don't mind that kind of support

Nice arrangement if you can get it !!!!

My wife has two brothers who, after some 25+ years of us being married, still have not put their hands in their pockets and contributed to their mothers medical and other needs.

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philuk

We used to send 50 quid a month when we first got married,   didn't mind that i wasted more than that on smokes,

 

then we bought a house next door to the brother in law that was split into two,   Nanay rents them out, and fixes what needs fixing, the rest is hers,

 

we set the brother in law up doing chop chop,  now the barangy  have stopped the whole street doing it on the side of the road so he uses our driveway,

every time he does a chop chop, he gives nanay 300 peso, and averages two a week

He also employs two of his brothers,

 

they are now totaly self sufficient.                            We actualy owe the sister in law about £2,000, as she paid the transfer of our lot and home owners fee,

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Raptor

 

 

The advantage of being involved with an only child whose parents are dead.

 

Put that in the Advice to Newbies thread.

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mpt1947

I think I have shared this before - when I first got here - 5 years in July, VECO hit us twice in one month - we didn't have the money to pay the other bill - Father in Law loaned us the money and we promptly paid him back as soon as my checks came in.

 

I transfer about $1500 a month to my wife's BPI Account.  In addition I pay the Cellphones (my wife and I) and Landline(s) plus I buy the first 10K pesos in Groceries from Shopwise on the first Wednesday of the Month.  Out of what I send my wife, she pays VECO, and all the employee salaries (7).  My wife has four younger brothers - one is a certified electrician and Plumber - he takes care of that for us, another we set up an Internet Cafe and we get a piece of their action on a monthly bases - the 3rd brother suffered a stroke before I came here, but is a whiz with small motors and fixes all of our fans.  The last brother is a widower and working hard to put his daughters through college - my wife doesn't give him a handout, but does help him find jobs

 

My wife has a loan business and really doesn't need me for anything but it is nice to be able to save money for rainy days - 

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Wolfpack

It's a part of the culture here. So sound off how much if any do you contribute?

 

This is not money you give your gf for her and kids. This is money you give for her parents brothers and sisters, etc...

 

I am a firm believer in the chain of command...I give to my wife she decides how and when she desires to contribute...she gives to her parents...they distribute as they see fit...

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hilyfe

I am a firm believer in the chain of command...I give to my wife she decides how and when she desires to contribute...she gives to her parents...they distribute as they see fit...

 

Ill do the same if im married

Let her handle all the money and bills

And do what ever she wants with it

As long as she doesnt bother me with my rc's

Ill be fine with it heheheh

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Raptor

 

 

Ill do the same if im married Let her handle all the money and bills And do what ever she wants with it

 

You're looking for an American wife?

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Davaoeno

Hey!! I didn't say that as a complaint. I do it willingly because I believe it's the right thing to do--but we do give WAY too much.

 

this post seems contradictory to me .

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Jawny

We provide support based upon family needs and our ability to assist. It's never been a problem for us to make a decision.

 

With regard to the extended family (cousins, uncles, aunts etc) this is strictly a loan basis and rarely have we loaned any.

 

Some members seem to have pretty strong views on this subject of providing assistance. For us, it's just been common sense. Each situation is considered independently of others.

 

One form of assistance is to provide a monthly allotment to my wife's parents which is used for medicines.

 

Sometimes I read the comment or a variation "what would the family do if we (the foreigner) were not around?"

 

I can assure you that in my family some would die. Their lives would be cut short by the chronic illnesses they would leave untreated. Not only would they suffer for the lack of medical care, but they would die prematurely.

 

One of my wife's brothers did die because of this. We were unaware of the situation he was in, namely a severe urinary tract infection. Because the family didn't let us know, he was unable to get medical care. The UTI worsened until it was irreversible. He suffered and died for the lack of a few thousand pesos.

 

I've not had any difficulty in responding to requests for money. My wife is a gentle heart person and as such is often asked by neighbors or distant relatives for money. The response that has always worked for us is her to say..."Ask my husband". Never happened yet.

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