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Can I hear from people married to Filipinas?


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Thank you to everyone who has/is responding.

 

Thank you for the many personal testimonies!!!

 

That site seemed to be highly biased and to be deleting any positive posts.  I think it is good to get both sides of the story. All I had heard was positive up till then and that site was soooo negative.

 

To answer the questions (I’m new and have limited posts so I will answer everyone so far in one post):

 

  1. I will be flying there in may to Cebu to meet her for two weeks she has off between Spring and Summer semesters. She is in school for business, and will goto Law school after… which will leave us at same level of education.
  2. I am disabled vet with full disability, 40, look good, and all my exes have been beautiful so it is not a mismatch that way. She is 29 so the age is also not more than I was getting on Match.com for American women either.
  3. WE will be making roughly same money after her schooling so it will be equality in looks/education/money in a couple years.
  4. Not rushing, and I am not giving any financial support. We will date for a few years until she finishes undergrad and if things going well probably marry before she goes to grad school if things going well. I want at least couple years to date first, and she has agreed.
  5. I have seen no red flags as yet. I had talked with some others before her and dropped them when red flags appeared.
  6. I am not a saviour/white knight or financial support. When she gets done with school she will make a very good living for PH.  I think it is genuine love, at least it is on my part and have seen no red flags on her part yet.
  7. I agree it is not real until we survived good and bad times as real couple. I will take first step in May when I go see her (flying into Cebu… I made a thread asking for help in the correct place on this forum).
  8. Age difference is 11 years (40 to 29) I have one child, she has one child, and we plan on having more. Education answered above.
  9. I intend to watch interaction with family carefully. She is oldest daughter and I know we are expected to be financial supporters, I am ok with that to a point. I help take care of my mother now and expect to help her parents but don’t want to become money machine for extended family.
  10. Young-ish (40), swim 4kilometers several times a week so very fit and my last ex was thai swim suit model here in US, so I have history of dating beautiful women. Right now we plan on staying in PH. Don’t plan on controlling my wife but will take that in advisement about other Filipina… is there a reason why behind that?
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Met my wife in 1985 while stationed on Okinawa, wrote constantly traveled here 5 different occasions to spend time to know her, when discharged I brought her to the US on a fiancee Visa and we were ma

I seriously believe that financial security is part of the criteria for choosing a mate by any woman in any country.

My wife and I have been married almost 20 years now and I know her 23 years, so as tobster wrote, if you pick the correct lady, then life together will/can be wonderful. Let me add that you get out of

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shadow

It can be very difficult to find a good 'un, (took me seven years and hundreds of dates), but when it's good, it's REALLY GOOD! 10+ years married here, and counting.

 

If you haven't met her yet, and/or your relationship is only a few months old, you don't really know her. Hollywood has nothing over the acting ability of some of these girls.

 

See the links in my signature.

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Mikala

I recommend never bringing the girl to the States. Having a long distance relationship might be even worse since you never know what she's up to while you're not there. I recommend spending years in-person dating girls, finding out if they truly care about you and then planning to settle down in the Philippines. Don't file any paperwork with the US Embassy unless absolutely necessary.

 

I brought 1 Filipina to the States on a fiancee visa around 1998. Within a month, she disappeared (along with all her possessions) to join her real bf in Massachusetts, that couldn't afford to bring her to the States. She did email me an apology 5 years later. She was 28 when I met her.

 

I married the next Filipina several years later after "getting to know her". We traveled Asia together and had a lot of time to get to know each other (or so I thought). Brought her to my ranch on the Big Island of Hawaii and she started complaining about there being too many Filipinos there from Luzon (she's from Mindanao). Also in her complaints was that the Big Island was boring (she had lived in Quezon City for 5-6 years). One day I came home to find her gone (along with everything she owned). She joined her new boyfriend in Southern California. She filed for a quickie divorce in Vegas and married her new bf within 2 months of leaving me. Now she lives on some commune or something where she milks goats and does all kinds of hippy crap. She admits freely that she was never honest with me because I would have broken up with her if she'd been honest. She was 23 when I met her.

 

The next Filipina I had a relationship with (for 7-1/2 years) acted highly jealous the entire time, but I would find her profiles online trolling for other guys. I found where other guys had sent her money in excess of a 1,000 USD and there was even a time I found she had tried to immigrate to Sweden. She kept apologizing and I kept forgiving her. We must have broken apart over 1,000 times in 7-1/2 years, but I'd forgive her again and again thinking she did truly love me, but she was just a troubled girl. She managed to get me to finance a nice house for her parents. Then a new 30 foot fishing boat for her father. Then she stole money from me to the tune of 2,500 USD (but apologized). In the final years, she was claiming she had expenses exceeding 2,000 USD per month (a lot of medical related problems with her health). I finally called it quits when she produced a baby last October and the DNA test showed it was 1/2 Australian (I'm American). After being found out, she claimed that everything in our apartment was hers and that I had no proof of ownership. As a foreigner, I guess she's right. The police will side with her. So much for the thousands of dollars worth of furniture, appliances and souvenirs from around the world. My name was not on the lease, so I didn't have a leg to stand on. She was 18 when I met her.

 

Note: I'm not an ugly guy and don't abuse the girls. I do have a soft heart, but am considering myself an idiot for wasting so much time and money on girls that I considered "good girls". I didn't chase girls and was faithful to the girls while in the relationship. Maybe I had a sign on my back that said "easy mark" or "stupid foreigner"?

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shadow

Just for the record, Australians and Americans ancestors both being of European descent (with the exception of Aborigines and Native Americans), how could a DNA possibly test tell the difference?  Maybe your DNA test could read passports, or could detect Vegemite in her blood?

 

 

 

 

 

I finally called it quits when she produced a baby last October and the DNA test showed it was 1/2 Australian (I'm American).
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Mikala

 

 

how could a DNA possibly test tell the difference?

 

It helped when she admitted the guy was Australian. The DNA test merely said "0% child is related to parental evidence". I fudged the findings to match reality.

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I recommend never bringing the girl to the States. Having a long distance relationship might be even worse since you never know what she's up to while you're not there. I recommend spending years in-person dating girls, finding out if they truly care about you and then planning to settle down in the Philippines. Don't file any paperwork with the US Embassy unless absolutely necessary.

 

I brought 1 Filipina to the States on a fiancee visa around 1998. Within a month, she disappeared (along with all her possessions) to join her real bf in Massachusetts, that couldn't afford to bring her to the States. She did email me an apology 5 years later. She was 28 when I met her.

 

I married the next Filipina several years later after "getting to know her". We traveled Asia together and had a lot of time to get to know each other (or so I thought). Brought her to my ranch on the Big Island of Hawaii and she started complaining about there being too many Filipinos there from Luzon (she's from Mindanao). Also in her complaints was that the Big Island was boring (she had lived in Quezon City for 5-6 years). One day I came home to find her gone (along with everything she owned). She joined her new boyfriend in Southern California. She filed for a quickie divorce in Vegas and married her new bf within 2 months of leaving me. Now she lives on some commune or something where she milks goats and does all kinds of hippy crap. She admits freely that she was never honest with me because I would have broken up with her if she'd been honest. She was 23 when I met her.

 

The next Filipina I had a relationship with (for 7-1/2 years) acted highly jealous the entire time, but I would find her profiles online trolling for other guys. I found where other guys had sent her money in excess of a 1,000 USD and there was even a time I found she had tried to immigrate to Sweden. She kept apologizing and I kept forgiving her. We must have broken apart over 1,000 times in 7-1/2 years, but I'd forgive her again and again thinking she did truly love me, but she was just a troubled girl. She managed to get me to finance a nice house for her parents. Then a new 30 foot fishing boat for her father. Then she stole money from me to the tune of 2,500 USD (but apologized). In the final years, she was claiming she had expenses exceeding 2,000 USD per month (a lot of medical related problems with her health). I finally called it quits when she produced a baby last October and the DNA test showed it was 1/2 Australian (I'm American). After being found out, she claimed that everything in our apartment was hers and that I had no proof of ownership. As a foreigner, I guess she's right. The police will side with her. So much for the thousands of dollars worth of furniture, appliances and souvenirs from around the world. My name was not on the lease, so I didn't have a leg to stand on. She was 18 when I met her.

 

Note: I'm not an ugly guy and don't abuse the girls. I do have a soft heart, but am considering myself an idiot for wasting so much time and money on girls that I considered "good girls". I didn't chase girls and was faithful to the girls while in the relationship. Maybe I had a sign on my back that said "easy mark" or "stupid foreigner"?

 

sounds like you know how to pick them. after reading your post you have no clue.... but good luck on finding your lady. maybe ask a friend to recommend a girl for you, because you can't seem to do it yourself...

 

no disrespect i'm just telling you how i see it.

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Mikala

 

 

maybe ask a friend to recommend a girl for you, because you can't seem to do it yourself...

I agree with you. Obviously I don't know how to pick a "good girl" and now I'm in the beginning stages of dating a girl recommended by a friend. It's slow going, but I've got quite a few years before I retire anyway. I really want to set everything up so I don't have so many headaches after retirement.

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I recommend never bringing the girl to the States. Having a long distance relationship might be even worse since you never know what she's up to while you're not there. I recommend spending years in-person dating girls, finding out if they truly care about you and then planning to settle down in the Philippines. Don't file any paperwork with the US Embassy unless absolutely necessary.

 

I brought 1 Filipina to the States on a fiancee visa around 1998. Within a month, she disappeared (along with all her possessions) to join her real bf in Massachusetts, that couldn't afford to bring her to the States. She did email me an apology 5 years later. She was 28 when I met her.

 

I married the next Filipina several years later after "getting to know her". ...

 

The next Filipina I had a relationship with (for 7-1/2 years) acted highly jealous the entire time...

 

Note: I'm not an ugly guy and don't abuse the girls. I do have a soft heart, but am considering myself an idiot for wasting so much time and money on girls that I considered "good girls". I didn't chase girls and was faithful to the girls while in the relationship. Maybe I had a sign on my back that said "easy mark" or "stupid foreigner"?

 

Wow, your experience sounds like what is on that site. So sorry to hear!

 

I hope mine works out better! This is the third one I've tried talking with, and the first one I'm going to go see...

 

@shadow

 

Thanks for the advice. Slow and steady for me... I'll see in 2 years if it's still going this well. Going to try to move to Cebu then while she goes to law school there.

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Did you ever eat dinner with one?

 

Take her to a Kamayan restaurant   <_< ____note which hand she eats with.

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Sonny and Catalina, 25 years_____23 good 'uns_____2 hell on earth _____.2 grown kids.____gets better every year.   

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Can only tell you what worked for me, I backed my judgement. I saw her on a video and thought she was charming. I exchanged no more than 6 letters with her  and never spoke to her on the phone, but nethertheless arranged to come to the Philippines to marry her within 6 months of seeing that video. That was in 1986, I was 28, she was 21 and we're still happily married (28 years next month), and don't like being apart even now. People we meet for the first time are often surprised we've been married that long, but I'm able to convince them I was a child bride. :)

 

The toughest part of our marriage was when she came to the UK and I went off to work for 12 hours a day. She was so lonely and took ages for her to adjust to not seeing her family and friends. Fortunately, it will be easier for your GF as she will staying in the PI.

 

Marrying her was the most important and best decision I've ever made in my life and would 100% do it again.

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shadow

Can only tell you what worked for me, I backed my judgement. I saw her on a video and thought she was charming. I exchanged no more than 6 letters with her  and never spoke to her on the phone, but nethertheless arranged to come to the Philippines to marry her within 6 months of seeing that video. That was in 1986, I was 28, she was 21 and we're still happily married (28 years next month), and don't like being apart even now. People we meet for the first time are often surprised we've been married that long, but I'm able to convince them I was a child bride. :)

 

The toughest part of our marriage was when she came to the UK and I went off to work for 12 hours a day. She was so lonely and took ages for her to adjust to not seeing her family and friends. Fortunately, it will be easier for your GF as she will staying in the PI.

 

Marrying her was the most important and best decision I've ever made in my life and would 100% do it again.

I dare say the cards are stacked a bit differently than they were in 1986. It took serious commitment just to be a penpal in 1986. The internet now making it so fast and easy to communicate also makes it easy to scam.

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