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Study says married women must 'calm down' in spousal spats


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Salty Dog
By Edmund Demarche, Fox News November 20, 2013

 

A recent study says marriages are happiest when wives - not husbands – quickly calm down during arguments.

 

The study was conducted by a researcher at the Pacific Graduate School of Psychology in Palo Alto. The study points out that the overall happiness of the married couple did not improve when the husband regained his composure.

 

Shaunti Feldhahn has spent 11 years researching relationships and is about to publish a book called, "The Surprising Secrets of Highly Happy Marriages: The Little Things That Make a Big Difference."

 

She said men and women, in most cases, are wired differently. A woman has no problem articulating feelings during an argument while a man can find it difficult to process his emotion and his brain can go into the fight-or-flight mode, she said.

 

"He's conflicted because he doesn't want to fight the woman he loves, so he might need to step away and process everything," she said. "And this, of course, can just trigger her concerns."

 

A woman often needs resolution and if she does not get the resolution the problem can continue to bug her, she said. A man, however, can feel inadequate and find it difficult to articulate his feelings.

 

"One of the keys is understanding each other," she said.

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Wolfpack

 

By Edmund Demarche, Fox News November 20, 2013
 
A recent study says marriages are happiest when wives - not husbands – quickly calm down during arguments.
 
The study was conducted by a researcher at the Pacific Graduate School of Psychology in Palo Alto. The study points out that the overall happiness of the married couple did not improve when the husband regained his composure.
 
Shaunti Feldhahn has spent 11 years researching relationships and is about to publish a book called, "The Surprising Secrets of Highly Happy Marriages: The Little Things That Make a Big Difference."
 
She said men and women, in most cases, are wired differently. A woman has no problem articulating feelings during an argument while a man can find it difficult to process his emotion and his brain can go into the fight-or-flight mode, she said.
 
"He's conflicted because he doesn't want to fight the woman he loves, so he might need to step away and process everything," she said. "And this, of course, can just trigger her concerns."
 
A woman often needs resolution and if she does not get the resolution the problem can continue to bug her, she said. A man, however, can feel inadequate and find it difficult to articulate his feelings.
 
"One of the keys is understanding each other," she said.

 

 

I find buying canned beer instead of bottled beer helps...empty cans hurt far less then empty bottles...and easier to clear up after..

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By Edmund Demarche, Fox News November 20, 2013

 

A recent study says marriages are happiest when wives - not husbands – quickly calm down during arguments.

 

Shaunti Feldhahn has spent 11 years researching relationships and is about to publish a book called, "The Surprising Secrets of Highly Happy Marriages: The Little Things That Make a Big Difference."

The fact that women need to calm down isn't surprising or a secret... she should rename her book.

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Men are the head of the relationship between the man and the woman so of course it's a matter of the woman submitting. I agree with T.S., it's no surprise.

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thebob

I find buying canned beer instead of bottled beer helps...empty cans hurt far less then empty bottles...and easier to clear up after..

 

You see that is your problem. You just aren't taking her side at all. If you only drank tuba, you would be able to buy her a nice new pair of shoes or a bag.

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Wolfpack

You see that is your problem. You just aren't taking her side at all. If you only drank tuba, you would be able to buy her a nice new pair of shoes or a bag.

 

That is rather funny, last time someone gave me tuba I vomitted all over the house...she will NEVER EVER suggest me drinking tuba...and God help the poor soul who ever gives me any...

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thebob

 

 

last time someone gave me tuba I vomitted all over the house...she will NEVER EVER suggest me drinking tuba...and God help the poor soul who ever gives me any...

 

Why would you vomit "all over the house"? Feeling ill I can understand but vomiting "all over the house". I think you would need to drink a lot of tuba to get drunk so I'd guess you were mixing.

 

I haven't really heard of people getting sick drinking tuba, lots of people drink it for their digestion.

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BossHog

The Kirkland brand Tuba at S$R is much better than that local crap.

 

It comes in either Cool Ranch or Nacho Cheese flavor.

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Wolfpack

I haven't really heard of people getting sick drinking tuba, lots of people drink it for their digestion.

 

well, shah zam...now you have...

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broden

 

 

That is rather funny, last time someone gave me tuba I vomitted all over the house

like projectile?

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broden

so i guess you got all your furniture under those plastic slip covers now

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BossHog

When at Greenwich Pizza and feel like vomiting, I'll run across the mall and use the CR at Jollibee.

 

And vice versa.

 

They don't seem to mind.

 

It's actually encouraged.

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