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Gotta have ME time in a marriage


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Monsoon

maybe good for you. your cash ain't nuthin but trash and 50k is chump change...you think i'm gonna live in some dive out in east bumfeck and make pizzas for your fat ass? i'm stayin put right here up in the hills of guadalupe heights where the likes of you couldn't get past the gate house :)

 

How does 55k and a pocket wifi sound? 

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The standard allowance for wives is currently 50,000 a month.   If you're giving her less than that maybe you don't really love and respect her.   Also, you need to spend more couple time.

I hope she has a sense of humor, with some of the shit you guys are posting in this thread.        I need to have a talk with J!

Are all these relationship/family threads that you are starting purely so your wife will read them so you don't have to actually address the issues with her in person? Are you also possibly hoping tha

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Monsoon

I don't understand how you made a commitment to somebody, till death do you part, but don't want to spend all of your time with her. Surely love means that you would want to spend "more" time with her?

 

You are a married man. Your responsibility should be to your children first, your wife second, making sure her family are OK third, and finally making sure you are fit and healthy enough to take care of them.

 

Now you've done it Theb. When my wife reads this my life is over....

 

Oh wait a minute. My wife doesn't read LinC (AKA "That stupid forum you spend hours reading!") 

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Wolfpack

I don't understand how you made a commitment to somebody, till death do you part, but don't want to spend all of your time with her. Surely love means that you would want to spend "more" time with her?

 

You are a married man. Your responsibility should be to your children first, your wife second, making sure her family are OK third, and finally making sure you are fit and healthy enough to take care of them.

 

You gave up your right to ME time when you walked down the isle, and made a sacred promise.

 

As it is written in the Bible...

 

Ephesians 5, 25-27

 

Husbands, love your wives, as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her, that he might sanctify her, having cleansed her by the washing of water with the word, so that he might present the church to himself in splendor, without spot or wrinkle or any such thing, that she might be holy and without blemish.

 

You are right,

 

I will build her a house worth, let's say, 13 millions pesos, buy her a car, fill the house with top of the line stuff including an elevator and jacuzzi...then file for bankruptsy in the U.S.A.

 

My wife would surely love me enough to let me travel back and forth from U.S.A to Philippines on my own, while she stays in the states then...

 

yeah, now there is a plan!!!

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I hope she has a sense of humor, with some of the shit you guys are posting in this thread. 

 

 

Now you've done it Theb. When my wife reads this my life is over....

 

Oh wait a minute. My wife doesn't read LinC (AKA "That stupid forum you spend hours reading!") 

 

I need to have a talk with J!

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broden

smokey has too many sunflower seeds stored up to worry about bankruptcy 

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jtmwatchbiz

How does 55k and a pocket wifi sound? 

 

 

answer your doorbell

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Wolfpack

smokey has too many sunflower seeds stored up to worry about bankruptcy 

 

great, I am thinking about pitching as the closer for the NY Yankees next season, heard they have an opening...

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broden

great, I am thinking about pitching as the closer for the NY Yankees next season, heard they have an opening...

if you're a lefty there is always an opening

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thebob

:ROFLMAO:  :ROFLMAO:  :ROFLMAO:

 

Bob quoting scripture to Daniel...now I've seen it all.

 

You have to choose the right tool for the job. The bible is the only authority he listens to.

 

You are right,

 

I will build her a house worth, let's say, 13 millions pesos, buy her a car, fill the house with top of the line stuff including an elevator and jacuzzi...then file for bankruptsy in the U.S.A.

 

My wife would surely love me enough to let me travel back and forth from U.S.A to Philippines on my own, while she stays in the states then...

 

yeah, now there is a plan!!!

 

It's not about money, don't you remember the "richer or poorer" part? Your kids are your life now. 

 

Let me reinforce that feeling with a song...

 

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You are a married man. Your responsibility should be to your children first, your wife second, making sure her family are OK third, and finally making sure you are fit and healthy enough to take care of them.

 

You gave up your right to ME time when you walked down the aisle, and made a sacred promise.

 

 

I agree with most of what you say, but when you marry, you pledge to hold no other above your wife. You have to either put your wife ahead of your children or at least equal with them.

 

Friendship. Companionship. Closeness. These lay the foundation of your marriage. Concentrate on leaving and cleaving. Evaluate all other relationships in light of your relationship with your spouse. Make your wife your best friend. Make your husband your best friend. Start communicating like never before. Work on your marriage. Seek to make it better. As you aggressively do your part, following the counsel of Scripture, God will do His part and will bless your home.

 

http://www.oneplace.com/ministries/a-new-beginning/read/articles/marriage-101-8440.html

 

I am in no way holding myself up as a great example in this. I have made some major mistakes with my wife and in my life...but we are working through them together...as a team and NOT as adversaries. When you marry, you commit for life. You do that with no other relationship...not even with your parents or children. You left your parents to marry, and hopefully your children will leave you as well at some point to live their own lives and form new relationships...but hopefully you will be with your wife until the end. Otherwise...why marry?

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thebob

I agree with most of what you say, but when you marry, you pledge to hold no other above your wife. You have to either put your wife ahead of your children or at least equal with them.

 

 

If you have entered into a relationship and been blessed with children, without making sure that both of your goals is for their future above all else, then I think a reassessment of the game plan is in order.

 

It's not about money, it's not about "ME" time, anything less than 100% commitment just isn't good enough.

 

Children come first, next their mother, she can't be happy and a good mother unless you take care of the family, so they come third. If you are trying to carve out a "ME" space, it is being subtracted from the above.

 

To quote Cheryl Crowe "It's not having what you want. It's wanting what you've got"

 

This is what it's all about.

 

She also sings...

 

"I've got a crummy job

 

It don't pay near enough

 

To buy the things it takes

 

To win me some of your love

 

Every time I turn around

 

I'm looking up, you're looking down

 

Maybe something's wrong with you

 

That makes you act the way you do"

 

​This isn't the right attitude at all, to carry a relationship.

 

"I'm gonna soak up the sun

I'm gonna tell everyone

 

To lighten up 

 

I'm gonna tell them that

 

I've got no one to blame

 

For every time I feel lame"

 

This is the important part. Take responsibility for your situation, don't spend your life looking for someone to blame. Sort "your own head" out first, then everything will fall into place.

 

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If you have entered into a relationship and been blessed with children, without making sure that both of your goals is for their future above all else, then I think a reassessment of the game plan is in order.

 

It's not about money, it's not about "ME" time, anything less than 100% commitment just isn't good enough.

 

Children come first, next their mother, she can't be happy and a good mother unless you take care of the family, so they come third. If you are trying to carve out a "ME" space, it is being subtracted from the above.

 

This is the important part. Take responsibility for your situation, don't spend your life looking for someone to blame. Sort "your own head" out first, then everything will fall into place.

 

I think we are just about on the same page, but if you aren't caring for your wife, then the two of you won't be working together for your children's future. Sure, you should both be working together to help your children to succeed, but if the marriage foundations are shaky, then that just isn't going to happen. You build your children's future upon the foundation of a strong marriage...not the other way around.

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smokey

You are right,

 

I will build her a house worth, let's say, 13 millions pesos, buy her a car, fill the house with top of the line stuff including an elevator and jacuzzi...then file for bankruptsy in the U.S.A.

 

My wife would surely love me enough to let me travel back and forth from U.S.A to Philippines on my own, while she stays in the states then...

 

yeah, now there is a plan!!!

ha ha ha  bankruptcy  why not build her a 13 million peso house then buy  her a new car then take her to the usa and buy her another house a few more cars but still keep at least one years living expense in the bank  now that is a plan   i sure dont want to upset my 800 credit score 

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smokey

great, I am thinking about pitching as the closer for the NY Yankees next season, heard they have an opening...

yes they do have an opening but its assistant to the assistant bowl cleaner in the public CR and the job is perfect for you 

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I think we are just about on the same page, but if you aren't caring for your wife, then the two of you won't be working together for your children's future. Sure, you should both be working together to help your children to succeed, but if the marriage foundations are shaky, then that just isn't going to happen. You build your children's future upon the foundation of a strong marriage...not the other way around.

... I agree with both you and Bob. I thought that getting away from the in-laws and the Wives Club would be the solution to his problems. I still think that would help but its not the total picture. A lot more time spent with the wife and kids without any other influences I think is what will help.
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