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How to get family out of the house, kids out of the bedroom?


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Wolfpack

Give your wife an ultimatum. "They go, or I go. When I go, they can start paying the bills around here." If they don't, start packing a bag. See what is more important to her, then.

 

The thought has certainly crossed my mind, and I have discussed this with a couple people. Before I make that stand, I thought I would discuss this in a forum.

 

I am very close to making that stand, but there are severe consiquences to making that stand. So I damn well better be sure, I have looked at all other options first. at the moment, I am not seeing any.

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Tell your wife you don't want to make trouble but you think maybe her sister is coming on to you. And if that doesn't work, then tell her you're kind of liking it.

I think some members are missing a point here. BR is not p*ssy-whipped, and not without balls in this situation. He is looking at it as a true dad should. His primary concern, from what I see in his p

i assume the welfare of your 3 kids are what is confounding your difficult situation and preventing you from what you feel are radical moves to end your home and marital problems. you are right to rea

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Brother, it seems to me that your wife will only respond (hopefully in a positive manner) when you do that. 

 

I have a feeling that she will, due to the more detailed information about who rang the police, when you clarified that. 

 

I hope I am right, in that she will not want to throw away your relationship, over family hanging around your house, unwelcome by you. 

 

Personally, I would do exactly that. But, that is me. 

 

Either way, I wish you the best in this - adventure.

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Wolfpack

You have any kids together?

 

yes, as this post also says, how to get them out of the bedroom!

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Half Baked

And ,as asked in a previous post, who are these kids? how long have yall been married?

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Wolfpack

And ,as asked in a previous post, who are these kids? how long have yall been married?

 

3 kids in 6 years of marriage

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It depends who owns the house and who pays the bills, if rented and you pay all the bills then you leave and then let them fend for themselves for a while and see if the wife decides who is more important to her but if you own it, but of course in your wife's name, then basically you are screwed since this can be one of the problems we face when moving to the Philippines, if we do not set the ground rules up front and are not willing to move on if totally necessary.

 

There are lots of women in the Philippines willing to take us, so let that be known to your wife and tell her they go or you do.

 

As for keeping them out of the bedroom, put a lock on the door and kick them out and then lock the door every time you leave the room and do not even give your wife a key, just let her in when you wish to let her in. 

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Wolfpack

It depends who owns the house and who pays the bills, if rented and you pay all the bills then you leave and then let them fend for themselves for a while and see if the wife decides who is more important to her but if you own it, but of course in your wife's name, then basically you are screwed since this can be one of the problems we face when moving to the Philippines, if we do not set the ground rules up front and are not willing to move on if totally necessary.

 

There are lots of women in the Philippines willing to take us, so let that be known to your wife and tell her they go or you do.

 

As for keeping them out of the bedroom, put a lock on the door and kick them out and then lock the door every time you leave the room and do not even give your wife a key, just let her in when you wish to let her in. 

 

House is owned. If I make a stand and leave, no doubt, wife would sell everything and move back where she came from, and family where she comes from, IMO, is involved in this greedy position. I have discussed this greedy position with close friends.

 

The consequences, will hurt my children, and these folks are so stupid, they do not understand what they are doing.

 

I believe the family is behind the sister living in the house and refusing to get out. When I tell her to get out, she looks me straight in the eyes and says no.

 

When the police removed her sister last time, the father of my wife contacted the police with some crazy story he thought I was going to kill my wife. I found that to be very strange and the local police department did nothing regarding the father contacting them, other than telling me about it.

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Davaoeno
House is owned. If I make a stand and leave, no doubt, wife would sell everything

 

i assume you were smart enough to have your name  on the title also - that will prevent any quick sales

 

 

.

 

when I tell her to get out, she looks me straight in the eyes and says no.

 

you are not telling her in the right way !!   And while telling her just pick her stuff up and throw it out the door - that should do the job !   Either man up or face a life of being treated like this . Really - what have you got to lose ???   Right now you are just a piece of dog shit on the bottom of their shoes 

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House is owned. If I make a stand and leave, no doubt, wife would sell everything and move back where she came from, and family where she comes from, IMO, is involved in this greedy position. I have discussed this greedy position with close friends.

 

The consequences, will hurt my children, and these folks are so stupid, they do not understand what they are doing.

 

I believe the family is behind the sister living in the house and refusing to get out. When I tell her to get out, she looks me straight in the eyes and says no.

 

When the police removed her sister last time, the father of my wife contacted the police with some crazy story he thought I was going to kill my wife. I found that to be very strange and the local police department did nothing regarding the father contacting them, other than telling me about it.

As I wrote above, you are screwed and maybe it is time to cut your loses and move on before you end up in jail or worse should the family make a claim against you. If your wife takes family over you, then it is already over without the fat lady singing. My advice would be to ask your wife if it would be okay to put the house up for sale and if she says no then maybe you should to cut your loses and let her have the house and move on before they find another way to get rid of you.  As for the children, once the house is sold then your wife will have enough to take care of them for a while, at least until her family sucks her dry. You seem to be in a no win situation, so either live with it without making waves, or move on.

 

What is happening to you is why most of us should never buy a house in the Philippines where we lose control of our money.

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Wolfpack

i assume you were smart enough to have your name  on the title also - that will prevent any quick sales

 

 

.

 

 

you are not telling her in the right way !!   And while telling her just pick her stuff up and throw it out the door - that should do the job !   Either man up or face a life of being treated like this 

 

I am not concerned with any quick sales, should I leave this situation, financial loss is the least of my concernes.

 

The reason I posted the words how to get "family" out of the house...is because that is the real problem here. I see the sister as just a pawn of the family. The family telling her to stay, until only the police removed her. And when the strange phone call comes in from the father, it is ignored.

 

This forum is helping me think through this. and the answer is becoming rather clear, I need to go to the police this time, and ask them to get her out again.

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Wolfpack

As I wrote above, you are screwed and maybe it is time to cut your loses and move on before you end up in jail or worse should the family make a claim against you. If your wife takes family over you, then it is already over without the fat lady singing. My advice would be to ask your wife if it would be okay to put the house up for sale and if she says no then maybe you should to cut your loses and let her have the house and move on before they find another way to get rid of you.  As for the children, once the house is sold then your wife will have enough to take care of them for a while, at least until her family sucks her dry. You seem to be in a no win situation, so either live with it without making waves, or move on.

 

What is happening to you is why most of us should never buy a house in the Philippines where we lose control of our money.

 

Your words make a lot of sense...and most of which has been on my mind...before making the rash decision to move on..just looking to see if there might be another answer to this...but it sure does not look like there is one...

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Your words make a lot of sense...and most of which has been on my mind...before making the rash decision to move on..just looking to see if there might be another answer to this...but it sure does not look like there is one...

I feel for you man but at least you are still alive to move on, that cannot be said for others we have read about on forums where their spouses or spouses family decide their assets or money was more important than having those guys around, so they ended up dead. I am not saying that would happen to you but it is a possibility. The police are a good idea but if the wife wants her family there, then that will only be a temporary fix or they could turn the whole thing around on you. Get out for a week or so and stay in a hotel on your own to clear your head and think it all out without them being around.

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Davaoeno

 

 

I need to go to the police this time, and ask them to get her out again.

 

 

mmmm how about putting her out yourself instead of calling the police every time you have a problem ????

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Blue Ridge, and I mean every word I state here - brother, unless you know for a fact that your wife loves you implicitly, you may want to consider moving on. 

 

The worst case here is, you could end up as an assisted suicide. I am more concerned about that, personally, than any other issue at hand, here. 

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