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Is my girlfriend cheating


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Johnvictor

Hi. I hope you can help.

 

I have been seeing a Filipino girl from Cebu for 7 months and am madly in love with her. But whilst i have made sure that i see her at least once a month for 4 to 5 days at a time i have my suspicions that she is cheating...

 

I saw something on her phone that made me suspicious and she brushed aside my questions - however the communication was between her and another guy and she quickly deleted all messages... this in itself is enough but i truly love her and i need to make sure before i do anything stupid.

 

She saved his name as 'Den Sen Oia' - his name isn't this.. Can anyone translate this for me if it has any meaning or at least tell me not to worry.

 

thank you

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Maybe it would be a minority with the Filipinas YOU know, but I assure you that there are a LOT of good Filipinas who want exactly that...love that lasts a lifetime. Maybe you are just hanging out wit

That is not true at all. There are many girls who love their respective boyfriends or husbands, and wish to stay with them for life.

Can I buy another vowel please ?

udonthani

you're in the UK but visit the Philippines every month for 4 or 5 days at a time?

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it means : "He who wields a big stick " in cebuano. in Waray it means a Tarzan .

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Johnvictor

i didn't actually say she lives in the Philippines now but she does live in Asia and I visit her every month as i said...

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Paul

First, if you trusted here, and assuming you are not the jealous type, you should trust her.

 

Second, if something in the back of your mind is causing you to question that, then there may be something to it.

 

Third, does she go through your cell phone, looking at and reading the messages?

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Paul

If she is deleting messages, although I am not a believer of reading each others' cell phone texts, and if she makes a point to delete them before you can read them, obviously she is hiding something. (But, that is too much like going through my g/f's purse. That is something I just do not do.)

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BossHog

"Cheating" may not be the term you're looking for.

 

Have you explicitly discussed a mutual relationship, and are you both committed to it?

 

She may just be playing the field looking for an upgrade and naturally assumes you're doing the same.

 

That's 5 cents you owe me.

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Johnvictor

Thanks for the advice Paul - i know its not right to go through her Cell phone but I am at a stage where I am looking to make a long term commitment to her. many things have been written about Filipino girls and westerners and what the true motives maybe behind the relationship from the girls perspective and whilst i believe she loves me i need to make sure before i have major problems in the future.

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Johnvictor

maybe you are right Boss .. who knows

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Paul

Well, there is - obviously, something wrong. Otherwise, she would not make it a point to delete texts prior to you seeing them. So, if the little hairs on the back of your neck are standing up, in my opinion, there is a valid reason. I would not commit to her, or send her money, until I knew for sure. (Yes, I realize you said she was in Asia, and not necessarily in the Philippines. But, I know you could be sending her some extra cash each month. If you are doing that, I would suggest stopping it - now.)

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Paul

"Cheating" may not be the term you're looking for.

 

Have you explicitly discussed a mutual relationship, and are you both committed to it?

 

She may just be playing the field looking for an upgrade and naturally assumes you're doing the same.

 

That's 5 cents you owe me.

 

This is a very valid statement. I mean, is her view of your relationship the same as yours? You definitely need to talk with this chick and find out, especially if you have intentions of marrying her, or even considering a long term relationship with her.

 

Okay, guys, I am outta here. I gotta go get some supper.

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"Cheating" may not be the term you're looking for.

 

Have you explicitly discussed a mutual relationship, and are you both committed to it?

 

She may just be playing the field looking for an upgrade and naturally assumes you're doing the same.

 

That's 5 cents you owe me.

They always looking for an upgrade, .

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Johnvictor

Little Quinn .. i have been helping her financially and i had major doubts about whether she wanted me or my money - that was until she gave me back every single penny i have ever given her... i know how she got the money to do this and why she needed help before that and why she doesn't need financial help now. however whilst its not criminal or immoral i will respect her privacy as far as this is concerned.

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Paul
Little Quinn .. i have been helping her financially and i had major doubts about whether she wanted me or my money - that was until she gave me back every single penny i have ever given her... i know how she got the money to do this and why she needed help before that and why she doesn't need financial help now. however whilst its not criminal or immoral i will respect her privacy as far as this is concerned.

 

I would not simply respect her privacy, mate. You, obviously believe the relationship to be a mutual thing, perhaps for the long haul. I would suggest, as the previous poster suggested, to talk with her and find out where she sees your relationship going. You need to make sure you both are on the same page in this relationship. Otherwisse, someone (READ: you) could end up getting hurt.

 

Okay, laters.

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