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That's different to some 50 year old slobbering over an 18 year old when they have absolutely nothing in common and never will have.

 

 

with my daughter well into her teen years i have a natural inclination to agree with you, and yet i have to think of my grandparents. my grandpa's first wife died in childbirth. at age 48 he married my grandma, age 18. they had a wonderful marriage for 50 years.

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Jess Bartone

.....at age 48 he married my grandma, age 18. they had a wonderful marriage for 50 years.

 

98, quite a good innings. Love knows no numbers.

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SkyMan

Kind of amazing how someone can write up a really nice and well said post that nearly everyone agrees with and then some crazy hate mongers need to jump in and pull the thread off on some tangient that makes no sense and only serves to throw out their own moral beliefs as if they are the moral police or some such dribble. It's always the same trouble makers too. Take your hate to teh DK and leave the intelligent discussions alone.

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i was tempted to write a reply to the OP lambasting the general point of his thread praising "older" filipinas. but then my wife and i came to an agreement that i was wrong about the argument we had last night and that there is room for my further improvement as a human being. with that agreement she has forgiven me for my transgressions, apparently assuming that i have finally figured out what they were. now that all is happiness again i am able to second the motion of the OP and state that there are plenty of good things to be said about relationships with less young filipinas and i heartily recommend the notion.

 

it does seem to be a general rule of nature that, whether they (filipinas/women in general) are young or less young, sometimes you will be screwed with a kiss, sometimes without...

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SkyMan

.....they have absolutely nothing in common and never will have.....

Of course they WILL, and the real question is....So what?

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Hey I got no problem with age difference. But I don't think it's normal for middle aged men to be sniffing around 18 year old girls.

:surrender::kissass::itsokay:

 

...and you don't see the contradiction in what you just wrote? If his intentions are honorable, I see no problem.

 

No contradiction at all. The OP has an 18 year old daughter and my comments were speficic to that age group as I also have a daughter and two nieces that age. Filipnas are slower to mature than their western counterparts and i'm concerned that an 18 year old is often not mature enough to make a sound decision. My nieces have asked me to find them a husband like me. They mean someone who is financially secure who will look after them and their family. I tell them to keep studying and get a good job and love will find them just like it found their aunty and me. I have warned off an aussie and threatened a canadian who were sniffing around my nieces when they were underage and I will continue to protect them.

 

If a 25 year old filipina falls in love with and marries a 50+ man, good on them. Again, I have no issue with age difference as long as the woman is mature enough to understand what she is getting in to. I think there are a lot of guys who take advantage of the naievety and poverty of filipinas and I have no respect for those guys.

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Headshot

Your daughter was at university when she met someone in his thirties, not that big of an age gap really. That's different to some 50 year old slobbering over an 18 year old when they have absolutely nothing in common and never will have.

I'm glad to hear your daughter has found the man of her dreams.

What is with all this slobbering? Do you slobber a lot and think that all other men do too? I am 35 years older than my beautiful Filipina wife, and we have ten times more in common than I ever had with my ex-wife in the States...who was about my age. I don't slobber and never have. When I met my wife, we simply liked each other immediately. I sensed something special about her. She is a professional (elementary teacher), loves children, and loves me. I never knew how good love could feel before she came into my life. I am totally devoted to my wife, and would lay down my life to protect her. When her mother was introduced to me, we talked for a while, and she turned to her daughter and told her that I was a good man and that she should not let me get away. I also hit it off very quickly with her father. In fact, I get along very well with everyone in her immediate family. There is respect in both directions.

 

Another thing...you seem to have some idea that a man loses his sexual desires and abilities at 60-years-old. I am here to tell you that your concept is ridiculous. Many men have great sex lives throughout their lives. Those that don't often have older wives who have lost any desire for sex...thus depriving their husband of sex...unless the husband chooses to wander. There is an old axiom that says, "Use it or lose it." With sex, that is certainly true. A guy who is deprived of sex for a long time will have much more difficulty with his own abilities than one who hasn't been deprived. He may still have desires, but has problems getting there. Fortunately for many, there are medications that can help.

Edited by Headshot
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Julian C Thong

I have three daughters back in the States...all of them in their 30's. The oldest married a guy her own age (early 20's at the time). They are now divorced, since he was playing around on her (and married a younger woman right after he divorced my daughter).

 

The middle daughter was engaged to a guy her age (also early 20's) for several months, but just before the wedding date, he broke it off and got married to an 18-year-old girl. She hasn't had a boyfriend since and has buried herself in her career.

 

My youngest daughter met her husband while going to university. Her future husband was in his mid thirties, a successful businessman, and was just taking university classes every once in a while to meet women. He found my daughter. When they became serious, she introduced him to me. I welcomed him with open arms because it was NOT my place to make my daughter's life decisions for her. She was already an adult. They are very happily married with five beautiful, well-behaved, respectful children. She is a wonderful wife and mother and he is the most loving husband and father I have ever met.

 

So...pardon me if I totally disagree with any nonsense that says that age difference is a bad thing. It hasn't been my experience. If two people actually love each other and are mature enough to at least know what love is and what it requires, then they can have a long and happy existence together...regardless of ANY age difference. What others think is irrelevant. In fact, anybody outside the relationship has no place putting their nose into other people's business. If you have a problem with older men with younger women, you should just admit that it is YOU that has a problem...NOT them. MYOFB!

 

Well done headshot, again a voice of reason.

 

Everyone I've met is a biggot in one way or another, including myself. Why grownups think their view is any more valid than their childrens is beyond me. At the age of 18 or there abouts a person is at liberty to do why they think is right for them and parents loading on their own views is a form of abuse in my book. It is not easy to be a parent but the hardest part is allowing a child to develop in the way that is right for them. I wonder what would happen if the OP's daughter came home with a gay girlfriend over 20. Is that any better or worse than a man over 20?

 

On the subject of older men/women with much younger women/men, in my experience their view is derived from a Western upbringing, by that I mean Europe and the US, and I am not sure why it has developed over the last 100 years or so. Probably women's emancipation because more than 100 years ago it was very common for older men to marry younger women, if they could afford to marry at all. Of course it is not fround upon by 80% of the world's population, ie in the East and Middle East it is seen as a good choice for a younger woman to marry an older man as the latter has wisdom. Thus I deduce is is as matter of biggotry because there is no natural reason as a man can create children to his grave whereas a woman cannot.

 

What I find most disheartening is to find such negative comments from those who are in or choosing to be in a country where age is not seen as a deterent to a happy and productive marriage. Perhaps they should stay where they are if it causes such angst.

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wingandprayer

Oh c'mom.

18 year old girls in the states don't even date guys their own age.

Forget about the PI.

 

I wouldn't make such a sweeping statement, but have to agree that going older is common for younger women. Older men will provide the materialist life that most seem to think more important that loving or even liking who they go to bed with at night. As a matter of fact, anyone that has lived in a rural part of the South (TN, AL, GA) can tell you that girls as young as 14 are taken in by much, much older men. It's extreme, but it's also fairly common.

 

This is NOT to say I support it....nor would ever go after or accept the advances of a girl of a tender age.

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wingandprayer

Isn't the simple answer that there is no "cookie cutter" question of age difference? For some it's love and respect. For others it's a trophy girlfriend or wife. At any rate, why do we care?

Edited by wingandprayer
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Jess Bartone

Not to lose sight of Mike's Original Post... you and Mel are lucky to have found each other Mike, just as Mary Grace and I are similarly blessed... people with love in their hearts deserve nothing but the best.

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As the OP - I want to clarify that I am not advocating for relationships in which the couples are closer in age - I am just suggesting that there are plenty of older gems, especially in the Philippines, who are really worth a look or two.

 

When I made my comment about knowing guys who have much younger wives I was thinking of Jesse and Headshot when I wrote that comment. I knew that Jesse had at least 25 yrs on his bride and thought Headshot had an equal number of years on his - didn't know it was 35. It is very easy to read their posts, PM and Emails and see that they truly LOVE their spouses.

 

 

I reviewed my Post with my wife and we agreed that EVERY relationship is an EXCEPTION and that those relationships that WORK - the participants WORK at them.

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Stranded Shipscook

i think the more crucial point is, that one meets a person with character similarities. equal educational and work status, life experiences, common interests and hobbies.And many more.

 

And age is not necessary a factor in the above list.

 

One can be 25 and has already developed a firm personality and one can be 50 and still isn't further developed than a teenager.

 

And of course an older person is most probably more mature, but no guarantee for that. I found many very interesting women in any age category, but have to say, 25 is a sort of minimum age though. Most interesting would be 30 and above.

 

For the dating site thing, i strongly suggest to find woman which have a good employment or a business. or at least a good education which could lead to an employment. Single woman (by choice or accident) are not a bad idea too, if they are independent and not in it for financial security only. They usually are very responsible characters. With exemptions as always

 

On the other hand, that is me, and i am sort of an 'intellectual" type who likes to communicate with a woman as a partner.Sexual attraction is secondary. I wish i would be more simple and could live with a housewife type, but i can not. This is not meant in a negative way ! More like in the broad sense that different guys look for different woman.

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For Real

.....such sicko's.....

 

Not like you to paint with such broad sweeping strokes whitey.

 

I threw away my 3 inch brush...a steady hand & the 6 inch brush gets the job done quicker and the blemishes are not seen to the naked eye biggrin_01.gif

 

Seriously, the cases mentioned vary greatly & really its none of my business what one consenting grown adult does with another consenting adult.

 

However in the case of Family (as i mentioned in my first post), it becomes my business...and I am firmly of the thinking that any grown man tampering with or attempting to tamper with any 18 year old girl is not the full quid!

 

I see no need for detail

Edited by Malipayon Puti
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Jess Bartone

.....one can be 50 and still isn't further developed than a teenager.....

 

I resemble that remark.

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