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Father-in-law has passed away


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The Father-in-law has passed away.Has anyone here been through this?Can anyone tell me what to expect?

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It varies slightly depending on your wifes familys faith. If they are catholics

Well

Most of the organization is done by the funeral homes. St Peter is probably the best-known here, catering for rich and poor alike. They make available all that is required, from coffin and embalming

Bundy;

 

My best to you and your family over this lost. My father-in-law died about two years ago. I was in the States when he passed but in answer to your question as for me I became more responsible for family matters after he died. Maybe that will happen to you, But again my best to your family.

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Bundy;

 

My best to you and your family over this lost. My father-in-law died about two years ago. I was in the States when he passed but in answer to your question as for me I became more responsible for family matters after he died. Maybe that will happen to you, But again my best to your family.

Thankyou Cary,

You know, i thought i was well travelled and versed in most things Filipino over the past 24 years but as yet i have never experienced a funeral, let alone for a family member.

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Condolences bro,

 

I been to 2 funerals. They come, they go, they move on.

 

Usually they stay up all night, morning or drinking, then after funeral some foods and beer.. the next day they already moved on.

Filipinos are very strong like that.

 

Andy

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Sorry too mate, my father inlaw is ready to pass on and my wife and me have been talking about the things we need to do. He lives kinda like in a different state. All i can gather is that there will be a mourning period of about a week where the body will be on display at their home for visitors and prayers. Because the folks are relatively poor i expect to pay for the burial plot, the funeral and other costs like food and drink for the visitors. Cant put a figure on that yet just got to wait and see....Peter

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Bundy;

 

Just like Oz says because my wife's family is poor I paid for everything. She and talked on the phone, she told me what they needed and I think I sent her $5k to cover the funeral, burial plot, after service and a budget for Lola - - her mother since dad was gone. And he was the main bread winner of the family. Exactly how much the funeral and services were I can't say.

 

 

 

 

 

Sorry too mate, my father inlaw is ready to pass on and my wife and me have been talking about the things we need to do. He lives kinda like in a different state. All i can gather is that there will be a mourning period of about a week where the body will be on display at their home for visitors and prayers. Because the folks are relatively poor i expect to pay for the burial plot, the funeral and other costs like food and drink for the visitors. Cant put a figure on that yet just got to wait and see....Peter

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Condolences bro,

 

I been to 2 funerals. They come, they go, they move on.

 

Usually they stay up all night, morning or drinking, then after funeral some foods and beer.. the next day they already moved on.

Filipinos are very strong like that.

 

Andy

 

 

Sorry too mate, my father inlaw is ready to pass on and my wife and me have been talking about the things we need to do. He lives kinda like in a different state. All i can gather is that there will be a mourning period of about a week where the body will be on display at their home for visitors and prayers. Because the folks are relatively poor i expect to pay for the burial plot, the funeral and other costs like food and drink for the visitors. Cant put a figure on that yet just got to wait and see....Peter

 

 

Thanks Fellas,

Yeah, this is pretty much what i envisaged.We are currently in Bundaberg but will be back there on Saturday.One thing which has made it somewhat easier for us is that it was expected ( at any time so to speak ) so it's not so much of a shock.Yes, ofcourse we will shoulder all costs as our folks are also relatively poor.The wife has been ofcourse very upset as she was closest to her father, but she is strong and also she knew it was comming.

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Not sure how prepared your wife's family is, immediate considerations are:

 

tomb/cemetery;

coffin;

burial schedule/church services;

nightly vigil for 8 days;

9th day of prayer.

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Not sure how prepared your wife's family is, immediate considerations are:

 

tomb/cemetery;

coffin;

burial schedule/church services;

nightly vigil for 8 days;

9th day of prayer.

 

Well, i can imagine what things are like there for the rest of the family and prepared would not be the word for it. The coffin is already in the house but apart from that, they will be waiting for the wife to arrive and organise everything.

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It varies slightly depending on your wifes familys faith. If they are catholics

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Thanks for that explanation Elinel.

 

 

 

It varies slightly depending on your wifes familys faith. If they are catholics

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It varies slightly depending on your wifes familys faith. If they are catholics

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I just experienced the death of my father-in-law and returned from the Philippines this past weekend. The cost for the funeral home was P75,000, this included the body being displayed for 3 days, embalming, and taking the body to the church for 5 days of viewing and then on to the cemetery for burial. The cemetery charge was P88,000 for the burial plot. I'm told there is a premium when buying a plot when needed rather than in advance. P700 was paid to a woman to plant grass on the plot after burial and then P900 for a years worth of plot maintenance. The Catholic Church charged us P5000 a day for the room adjacent to the Church where the body was displayed for 5 days total P25000. A different priest came every day to say mass at a stipend paid to the Priest of P350. The Church charged P1500 for the "choir" which only consisted of two people and then another amount for the funeral mass (cant remember amount). Family and guests for the viewings have to be fed each day. Also reception after the burial had to be catered at a cost of P12,500. Then there was the Aunt who invited us out to dinner and brought 10 relatives and we had 15 and guess who ended up being presented the bill (P8,800). Then there was the brother in Manila who had to be bought a plane ticket otherwise he couldn't come.

 

Relatives in the states collected donations and the woman who was in charge of sending the money to the Philippines (my wife's 80 year old Aunt) was killed in a car accident on the way to withdraw money from her bank. To date, that money has not arrived.

Edited by Wonderer
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Most of the organization is done by the funeral homes. St Peter is probably the best-known here, catering for rich and poor alike. They make available all that is required, from coffin and embalming to electric candles, pictures,transporting the coffin to the cemetery etc. If your father-in-law was insured by St. Peter, no additional expenses are incurred, Church members will usually organize the daily prayers. A place in a cemetery needs to be bought (if it hasn't already been done). Often people organize a beray (which is a group of friends and neighbors that help one another in the event of a death within their group); they will help in bringing foods or snacks for those attending the wake.

You will need a place for visitors to sit (preferably outside but under cover e,g, tarpaulin), benches, chairs and tables and importantly enough food, coffee and Tanduay - around the clock, also playing cards and dices.

 

You can expect to following expenses if the event is not in a classy location and in the middle of the city:

St. Peter services P25.000++

Cemetery plot P10.000++

Grave stone P2.000++

Church (Mass) P1.000++

Cost for electricity, water, gas, firewood P2.000++

Documents, transportation P1.000++

Foods, snacks, drinks depends on number of days of the wake, class of visitors, reputation of the family etc. P2.000++ per day

Foods and drinks for the burial day P10.000++

 

So, for your budgeting purposes, expect to pay P70.000 upwards if your father-in-law was not insured and no cemetery plot is available. This should be fine for a normal middle-class occasion. P100.000 or maybe up to USD 2.500 should easily be sufficient.

Hope all goes well for you.

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