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aiden9991

Stay Or Leave The Philippines? Your Thoughts Please. So Confused!

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newtocebu

Hi neighbour

I was in a similar situation to you a few years ago

I love the Philippines and all its faults, but I couldnt imagine raising my family there

We had just had our first child when we moved to back to Australia

You brought your kids into the world, so their future should be your number 1 priority 

So many in the same situation only think of what they want and what makes them happy, and deprive their kids (and wife) of a good future

You are still young and have good earning potential back in the UK to support your family 

I was lucky enough that I had a job lined up before I returned - it didnt take long for my wife to find a job and contribute to our future too

Note: I dont begrudge anyone that chooses to raise their kids in the Philippines - there are a lot of you here that are doing a good job of it ( financial security plays and important role )

Another note: I had my work Christmas party last night and im still half cut, so I will read this later to see whether it makes any sense

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petecebu
1 hour ago, newtocebu said:

Hi neighbour

I was in a similar situation to you a few years ago

I love the Philippines and all its faults, but I couldnt imagine raising my family there

We had just had our first child when we moved to back to Australia

You brought your kids into the world, so their future should be your number 1 priority 

So many in the same situation only think of what they want and what makes them happy, and deprive their kids (and wife) of a good future

You are still young and have good earning potential back in the UK to support your family 

I was lucky enough that I had a job lined up before I returned - it didnt take long for my wife to find a job and contribute to our future too

Note: I dont begrudge anyone that chooses to raise their kids in the Philippines - there are a lot of you here that are doing a good job of it ( financial security plays and important role )

Another note: I had my work Christmas party last night and im still half cut, so I will read this later to see whether it makes any sense

Hi,

it makes plenty of sense.

I mentioned earlier it's about long term planning whilst still young and doing what will be right for the kids.

Edited by petecebu
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bob the builder

Dont listen to much to people comparing living expense, ive also been here 10 years been maried the last 4 so weve been doing 6 months about. The quality of life in the uk is well worth the extra and you have to put the children 1st theres not much opportunity here for kids. Back in the uk they will grow up with so many options i think any foreigner who thinks raising a family here are basically being selfish thats my 2 penny worth crack on and give it a go 

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RogerDuMond
7 hours ago, Kabisay-an gid said:

One guy I used to work with had his younger Filipina wife leave him (and of course she took their child) for a younger American guy. Turned out her circle of "westernized" Filipina friends had been encouraging her to "dump that old fart and get yourself a younger guy", and that's exactly what she did.

The problem with these few cases is not who the husband allows his wife to associate with, but his initial choice of a spouse. If you have to "handcuff" your wife to keep her from leaving, then you have more serious problems and they are of your own making.

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Davaoeno

I think many younger filipinas are not that well educated and very naive , so it is easier for people who they think know a lot more than them to manipulate them .  Just because your naive wife falls prey to a bunch of predatory  bitter  older women does NOT mean that you made the wrong choice !

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smokey

All reasonable ans. But reminded of a song by the white rapper.   IF I HAD A MILLION DOLLARS 

 

In arizona my wife has 5 friends from the philippines 3 are there with their new husbands who are richer and younger then their last ones 

Edited by smokey
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Jester
30 minutes ago, RogerDuMond said:

The problem with these few cases is not who the husband allows his wife to associate with, but his initial choice of a spouse. If you have to "handcuff" your wife to keep her from leaving, then you have more serious problems and they are of your own making.

My wife is not a prisoner and I don't want one!   She has a driver license, car, money in the bank, credit cards etc and knows where the door is.

Her job drives the insecure, jealous, control freaks off the deep end, she is a hair stylist in a high end mens salon and I do not lose one moments sleep over it.   

Choose wisely.     

 

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Davaoeno
16 minutes ago, Jester said:

high end mens salon

Google says -- " High End Mens Salon "  - usually a reference to an establishment frequented by gay men .

 

I wouldnt be worried either ! :D

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Tradewindze
22 hours ago, jtmwatchbiz said:

i think your idea and plan is a good one.  i would say keep working on it.  

I agree. The only way you are going to find out if it will work is by trying. It will be good for your kids and your parents. You should know well before 6 months if its the right move. If not, you haven't burned your bridges to Cebu. 

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Cgu

I have a few friends who moved to UK/US once the kids were ready for tertiary education, so you still have time if you want. 

My friends made sure that their kids fulfilled the requirements for their chosen universities overseas and applied early. So if you want this option, make sure that your kids have the proper requirements here (chose which schools in the Philippines, which are accepted by the Universities in the UK. There are plenty of links and information on the web from UK universities).  Your kids should not have problems as they are UK citizens, Also, university is a change for all kids (friends environment etc.), so in any case it will be a change for them and they are (more) prepared for that.

It will give you also time to apply UK citizenship for your wife (I am not familiar with this, but you would know what are the requirements).

One of my friend also stayed in the Philippines, but the kid went on his own to the UK. At this age it is possible as well. Many kids are away from their parents anyway during the university study. 

This will give you more flexibility to stay or move to the UK.

Edited by Cgu

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aiden9991

The detailed and elaborate responses so far to my initital post has generated, is very much appreciated.

Everyone possesses a distinguishing point of view and its so fascinating to read all the diversifying comments. Well the flight is booked for Feb 2 and I have decided not to burn my bridges to Cebu as yet. I understand that children do in fact come first but not at the expense of being miserable in the UK. I originally left the UK since i was 21 when i was travelling. It is such a challenge to return to a life in the UK. I like numerous others have quite lost their true identity and just blending back into that British way of life could no longer be appealing. 

Is the British education system really worth it? When it comes with all the social problems such as underage drugs and alcohol, exposure to teenage pregnancy,  usage of profanity yes may sound like im winging but its not as prevalent here in private schools and schools in general. You dont hear kids gping round using foul language like back in the uk. Teachers here do seem to be more caring than the uk. This is one observation my wife and mother madee. Correct me if wrong . Keep the input coming guys open to all sorts of comments and views. 

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petecebu
21 minutes ago, aiden9991 said:

The detailed and elaborate responses so far to my initital post has generated, is very much appreciated.

Everyone possesses a distinguishing point of view and its so fascinating to read all the diversifying comments. Well the flight is booked for Feb 2 and I have decided not to burn my bridges to Cebu as yet. I understand that children do in fact come first but not at the expense of being miserable in the UK. I originally left the UK since i was 21 when i was travelling. It is such a challenge to return to a life in the UK. I like numerous others have quite lost their true identity and just blending back into that British way of life could no longer be appealing. 

Is the British education system really worth it? When it comes with all the social problems such as underage drugs and alcohol, exposure to teenage pregnancy,  usage of profanity yes may sound like im winging but its not as prevalent here in private schools and schools in general. You dont hear kids gping round using foul language like back in the uk. Teachers here do seem to be more caring than the uk. This is one observation my wife and mother madee. Correct me if wrong . Keep the input coming guys open to all sorts of comments and views. 

Well the flight is booked, good luck. Just go for it now. Time will tell. You will know eventually if the right decision was made. Better to try than not and be wondering for the rest of your life. Best wishes to you all. 

Edited by petecebu
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petecebu

@aiden9991

did you eventually work out how to get / transfer your money from the sale of your car, etc to the UK?

Last thing you need when back there is a no cash access headache to kick off with.

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aiden9991
52 minutes ago, petecebu said:

@aiden9991

did you eventually work out how to get / transfer your money from the sale of your car, etc to the UK?

Last thing you need when back there is a no cash access headache to kick off with.

Yes figured it out.

I wired the money from my wifes bpi account to the uk. Approx few 4,000 gbp. For some reason bdo didnt allow it with mu peso account. They required i open a usd account with a min bal. Of 10,000 . The rest of it im going to hand carry approx 4,000gbp. I believe I'm legally allowed to carry max  10,000usd.

The rest of it leave it here in the account.

Im sure there are alternatives however i felt the most secure method was bank to bank transfer.

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