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TequilaSunset

4th visit... feeling even more at ease here now

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Mr. Mike

Beautiful lady and a great post!

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TequilaSunset

Thank you, I feel pretty lucky

Beautiful lady and a great post!


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Soupeod

Nice post and a good looking couple! Thanks for sharing. 

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oztony
2 hours ago, soupeod said:

Nice post and a good looking couple! Thanks for sharing. 

A couple of nice couples in those shots ...the red horse and lechon looked pretty darn good also..........:lol:

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Dafey

Great insight TS! Thanks for sharing.

5 hours ago, TequilaSunset said:

FLOWERS: I bought her the very first flowers she has received. I got more thank you's for those than anything ever! Such a simple thing meant so much to her! Really cute watching her take selfies with them.

Let's hope word doesn't get out or we'll all have to do this!!!

Actually, I agree with you, the simplest things make Filipinos happy and it's fun to be the instigator.

5 hours ago, TequilaSunset said:

MY ATTITUDE: Feeling like I am more relaxed, just accepting things as they are, and not getting overly worked up on the tiny details. I actually seem to have more patience than my GF

Probably the most important advice you can give potential Cebunaughts...relax. you're not in the "mother country" and things are just plain different.

 

5 hours ago, TequilaSunset said:

I can see me living here,

Do it !!! I also highly recommend retirement!

One thing I notice from your writing is that the GF and family seem very proud that she's dating you. That means you're a good guy and carry the respect of the family and the Filipinos you meet. There are some Expats in my vicinity that carry the "Typical Foreigner" paradigm to an extreme and it's embarrassing to be associated with them...so I try not to!

Where in the province are you?

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Kabisay-an gid
7 hours ago, TequilaSunset said:

IMG_20180505_205129302_LL.jpg

Screenshot_20180504-230633.png

 

She looks like a keeper to me!  :thumbsup:

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TequilaSunset

Alegria, near St Joseph's Parrish, just passed Kawasan Falls. The family is super nice but very shy. The kids yell Bruce as they pass by, her work mates were all very nice and accepting of me... I feel part of the herd instead of the next meal.

Great insight TS! Thanks for sharing.

Do it !!! I also highly recommend retirement!

One thing I notice from your writing is that the GF and family seem very proud that she's dating you. That means you're a good guy and carry the respect of the family and the Filipinos you meet. There are some Expats in my vicinity that carry the "Typical Foreigner" paradigm to an extreme and it's embarrassing to be associated with them...so I try not to!

Where in the province are you?

 

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I'm thinking so. We have our moments like any couple, but when we are together it's pretty damn effortless... It just works. It's the time away that causes issues.

 

She looks like a keeper to me!  

 

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Jim Sibbick

Thankyou but not sure why you need to tip taxi drivers.

By the way, walking can often be quicker than riding in a taxi, so I mostly walk these days.

 

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TequilaSunset
Thankyou but not sure why you need to tip taxi drivers.
By the way, walking can often be quicker than riding in a taxi, so I mostly walk these days.
 
Because at the moment I can afford to do so. I've lived on a day to day basis before, where a few tips really helped. I see nothing wrong in tipping when I feel the urge.

Walking to IT Park from the Quest is not faster, and also way more sweaty and riskier.

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Jim Sibbick

Thankyou but Quest to IT park is such a short distance I would only consider a taxi if it was raining. 

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TequilaSunset

I have the opportunity to take my GF to work and pick her up in a aircon taxi... And spend more quality time with her. It's a no-brainer to me.

Thankyou but Quest to IT park is such a short distance I would only consider a taxi if it was raining. 


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Salty Dog
47 minutes ago, Jim Sibbick said:

Thankyou but Quest to IT park is such a short distance I would only consider a taxi if it was raining. 

Is that because you like to walk or like to save P50.

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newtocebu

Thanks for your post mate

You have a great attitude - very much required for long term living in the Phils

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softail

Your post was really refreshing.  I like your attitude, so many give the impression that they are some how a celebrity and above the locals. It sounds at least at the present time that she has a great family that aren’t looking for a cash cow, that is so important. 

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Jim Sibbick
39 minutes ago, Salty Dog said:

Is that because you like to walk or like to save P50.

Both!

I am Kuripot and in need of excersise!

 

 

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Dafey

During my first year the taxis used to piss me off with short cuts that weren't, hot cabs, too loud music and general I don't care attitude. I found that their bad attitude was affecting mine. So now I smile and ask to turn down the music or if t's too hot I'll ask if I can crack the window open. If my fare is 90 pesos I let him keep the 100 peso note...Salamat! (enjoy your 20 cent tip) And when I get the 1%er that goes above and beyond I tip him very nicely. My attitude has improved and makes Asawa feel good too!

It's all relative living here....(and I'm not talking in-laws)

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TequilaSunset
Your post was really refreshing.  I like your attitude, so many give the impression that they are some how a celebrity and above the locals. It sounds at least at the present time that she has a great family that aren’t looking for a cash cow, that is so important. 
Thanks, so far so good! My culture dies hard on some things, it's all about finding a balance that works for both of us.

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TequilaSunset
During my first year the taxis used to piss me off with short cuts that weren't, hot cabs, too loud music and general I don't care attitude. I found that their bad attitude was affecting mine. So now I smile and ask to turn down the music or if t's too hot I'll ask if I can crack the window open. If my fare is 90 pesos I let him keep the 100 peso note...Salamat! (enjoy your 20 cent tip) And when I get the 1%er that goes above and beyond I tip him very nicely. My attitude has improved and makes Asawa feel good too! It's all relative living here....(and I'm not talking in-laws)

 

I had one driver that was particularly nice. Nice greetings, then was really happy to have me respond in visayan. He pulled up the front passenger seat so my big ass had more leg room, and was pretty chatty with me/us. At one point while stuck in traffic trying to leave SM Seaside, he had to exit the car to get his faulty trunk to close, and he apologized before getting out of the car to do it. He was a good man grinding out a living. I tipped him well and showed my GF how much before handing him the money. She is always watching what I tip and how much...and the funny thing is she said she knew I would and thought it was nice this time, and ok for me to do so. The GF really seems to have my best interest at heart. 

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delancey
10 hours ago, RangerUp said:

Many cultural reasons for this, the main one being that they aren't "poor", they are just like everyone else surrounding them, as they are taught. Americans are always comparing themselves to the rich and famous, because the attitude is more entitled, more competitive.

I don’t doubt you we are just having different experiences here.

In the context of a Barangay all they do is compare. They are comparing each other to see if any material thing or other gossip worthy thing changes. If they observe no changes then passively compare until they note changes. If they note positive changes to a neighbors lifestyle they even sometimes (not always) become unhappy... more like uncomfortable. Parochial poor live to compare because it is a prime component of gossip. 

Once again,  I am sure depending on many variables my opinion is just one of many.

As far as the OP as long as he is not too objectified as being a rich foreigner he sounds like he is doing great and his girl is a super keeper!

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TequilaSunset




As far as the OP as long as he is not too objectified as being a rich foreigner he sounds like he is doing great and his girl is a super keeper!


I hope they don't think I'm rich lol. They would be super disappointed if they do.

I've given them stuff, but not typical things. I once brought an adjustable camping rake for mom hahahaha. I saw how far she had to bend over to sweep the leaves with that native whisk broom. I wanted to save her back.

This trip I brought a knee brace for her and her bum knee, along with some tubes of Biofreeze. I brought chocolate for everyone too. Picked up to large drawing pads for her kid (budding artist, very talented) locally for like $1.65 USD. I was worried that buying the Lechon might make me a marked man... But they went and got 4 pigs for the Fiesta, rented massive kareoke system, and had food galore. So overall I feel I'm accepted for being the goofy Kano I am :D

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Dafey
16 minutes ago, TequilaSunset said:

I hope they don't think I'm rich lol

There is no getting around it...as a white foreigner you are considered "rich". I'm finally used to it as I am like you, definitely not rich. However, in their prospective you are richer than most everyone in that area so....you are rich!

If you didn't buy the lechon you'd be the "cheap" rich guy!

Don't stop treating your family though be careful to not go overboard.  It also makes her and her family proud that you are Rich AND humble.

 

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TequilaSunset

Well... I think I've let my girl know just how fast I'll run away if I feel I'm getting used for $$$. So far, it's very much a non issue, even if most of the family is not working. No idea where their money comes from, and I don't care. Things can always change in a heartbeat, I'm just not dwelling on it.

Last day with her and I leave early tomorrow morning... Ugh! Hopefully back in about 4 months! Off to breakfast, movies, chilling out...

There is no getting around it...as a white foreigner you are considered "rich". I'm finally used to it as I am like you, definitely not rich. However, in their prospective you are richer than most everyone in that area so....you are rich!
If you didn't buy the lechon you'd be the "cheap" rich guy!
Don't stop treating your family though be careful to not go overboard.  It also makes her and her family proud that you are Rich AND humble.
 


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cookie47
I am here on my 4th visit, and just want to share some things I have noticed since my last visit, including my attitudes. Some things for those of you that live here you are already aware of. For starters, GF has incredibly crappy hours that change, and it has killed a lot of the fun activities, but we are making the best of it.
LDR's: I never saw myself being in one of this distance, and time in between. Sucks when I am away. 7 months since last visit... we really needed this!
TRAFFIC:  DAYUMMMM, it seems so much worse here in the city, maybe due to the holiday and summer vacation. Oddly, I am pretty even keel about it all, just chill in the back seat of the taxi, and I will arrive when I arrive. Granted the cost goes up, but it is beyond my control'. The street chaos and mayhem just seems to be heavier.
SPEAKING OF TAXIS: Rear view mirror cams are new and even have rear-view cams, I applaud this!
MORE TAXI STUFF: Honoring "No left Turn" signs, (Never did before) only to follow with sketchy and to me illegal, U Turns in front of traffic! 
FILIPINO ATTITUDES: Not sure if possible, but people seem even nicer than the last visit. 
SUMMER MONTHS: At times... Hot AF!!
MY TAXI TIPPING: I found I am not suffering from the over tipping white knight syndrome any longer.  If the driver attempts to carry on a conversation with me, I tip much bigger. Beyond that, about 10-20 pesos for the quiet ones and almost nothing for the ones that spend the time loud talking on their cell phones the entire time.
NON AIRCON LITTLE BUSES: Riding this to and from the province will no longer be tolerated, by me, my ass, or my carbon monoxide filled lungs!
LECHON: The addiction to crispy skin is real!!! I bought the 30kg for 5k, great eats! The family did the re-cook thing for other dishes with the left overs, not a whole lot to work with there. They bragged after we left showing off the FOUR Lechon for the actual Fiesta, and all the party videos. Someday I will actually get to attend.
FILIPINO FAMILIES vs. AMERICAN: Poor Poverty Filipino families seem 10x happier than the average well to do families I know in the USA.
FILIPINO KIDS: They crack me up over the pleasure they derive from the smallest of things, very refreshing! Also how mesmerized the little ones in the province are over a big old Kano!
COMFORTABLE: Feeling more like I belong here (Being comfortable could be a bad thing) I keep my wits about me at all times,  maybe confident is a better word. I know my way around a bit more, practicing more visyan, and have adapted to street crossing (AKA Frogger) much better.
ROAD CONSTRUCTION: Saw a lot of it to and from the province. Looks pretty awful,  so very primitive.
FIESTA: Filipino's know how to have fun!
EXPATS AT THE MALL: I really notice them much more this time around. So many are really "Creepers", and I will just leave it at that. Many of the couples the woman doesn't seem real happy, where the woman seems to be dragged through the mall trailing her man.
MY ATTITUDE: Feeling like I am more relaxed, just accepting things as they are, and not getting overly worked up on the tiny details. I actually seem to have more patience than my GF (That could easily change!  ) I think me being an Air Force brat and living in Europe and a lot of travel to 3rd world countries etc, has really helped me adapt to places like Cebu.
MILLION DOLLAR VIEWS: They are everywhere in the province! (just have to look past the poverty)
Just some stuff... I had some nice conversations with some of my GF's workmates. Quite intelligent, and inquisitive. Funny to listen to some of their views of what they think Americans are and what the USA is like. They were spot on about many things on how they view us (a lot of it is not good) I learned about paper wrapping Mangoes on the trees, and other oddities in the Phil's. I can see me living here, it's just a matter of where and with who . I have been checking out ads on FB for rentals etc, just to get a feel for it. 
Did I mention crispy skin is like crack?  
RESTAURANTS: Tried a few more to add to my list. Hit up the RACK at Seaside (the mall was packed on a Sunday!) Tried their Katsu, me liked! Ordered their BRICK of onion rings, that' was too much! Would be great for 4 people or so, not us and large meals to go with it. SHAKA, good food and vibes, loved the live music. PARK SOCIAL IT PARK, this time finger foods (Loved the fresh chips and dip) and adult beverage on a Sunday night, listening to 70's-80's rock stuff,  very enjoyable evening. SUGBO MERCADO at IT PARK, didn't eat there, absolutely packed on a Sunday night, now on my hit list for the next visit. LEMON GRASS and HUKAD... great eats, love the soups. Just a few of the eats we had...
STAYS: The Quest for all but one night, and the Maracossa Cottages in Moalboal for the second time during our pre fiesta visit to Alegria. Decent breakfast is included, and I stayed for free with my Expedia points.
FLOWERS: I bought her the very first flowers she has received. I got more thank you's for those than anything ever! Such a simple thing meant so much to her! Really cute watching her take selfies with them.
So far so good... I hope the trend continues in a positive direction. I am excited about living somewhere in Cebu, but still looking at other islands, nothing carved in stone. Hell, if me and the GF don't work out, visits to other countries are on the back burner. 
A few pics attached of my time here... leaving Thursday morning, not happy about that. 
 
 
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Nice post, I've been coming since 84.
Yeh, fa sure some things have changed for the best and worst.
3 hours in January from Ayala to Consolacion, As you say, just sit back and relax.

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lamoe
4 hours ago, Dafey said:

There is no getting around it...as a white foreigner you are considered "rich". I'm finally used to it as I am like you, definitely not rich. However, in their prospective you are richer than most everyone in that area so....you are rich!

If you didn't buy the lechon you'd be the "cheap" rich guy!

Don't stop treating your family though be careful to not go overboard.  It also makes her and her family proud that you are Rich AND humble.

 

Basically same with Tata's family - only exception is one Uncle's wife - the one who ordered the 800 P crab and ate it all by herself and several hangers on at their compound trying to get me to buy Tanduay when I'm there  - I tell them she has all our money  -  ask her - works :biggrin_01:

 

 

 

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