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Travis

Paying the nanny while on vacation

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newtocebu
5 hours ago, Jim Sibbick said:

What is not clear to me in all this discussion is if the nanny was already paid in the normal way and this was some sort of bonus.

Im pretty sure that the 1,000 was in addition to her normal salary

Im on the fence about the nanny coming along in the first place - i do agree that it is (kind of) custom to include helpers on treats such as this, what I dont agree with is that so many girls become such princesses and wont even look after their own child

I can understand the need for helpers if the mother is working (as is in Travis' GFs case), however, i have seen so many girls come into money (ie; met a foreigner) and neglect their own kids because the higher status of having helpers is so much more important

Id like to know whether this helper was on the scene before Travis came along, and what her connection is with the GF (ie; family, friend etc)

 

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M.C.A.

NewtoCebu, there's too many girls like this that demand the Princess treatment and even the poorest of the poor have a Nanny or female partner that tags along where ever they go drinking, parties the tag along has to go, the connection is that she's her lover or she's made a slave out of a very poor person.

You're right the poor baby or child doesn't have the mother taking care of her but someone else while the mother is a real busy body and who pays for this sort of relationship, it's either the man who works abroad or the female partner that works, I've seen this same compfy woman set up so many times with my in-laws, people who visit us the lesbians or comfort setup, it's usually lesbian and many deny it, while the man is working as an OFW/Expat, they always have that tag along we call them Tom Boys here, this is a woman to avoid and many like this, they require special treatment , it's costly but some can afford it.

I've also noticed and was in awe at the women that can manage their babies/kids, wash their clothes, fix a meal and still provide some sort of income while the man works, and I'll bet the women with the tag a long can't cook either, so eating out all the time, it's called High Maintenance, it's 100% possible to find a women who's Low Maintenance and Beautiful.

Edited by M.C.A.
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delancey

I learned for me the tag along, extra leech thing was a no go. An adult female that needs someone with her (premise being you are going to safe public places) is a red flag to me.

(Primarily  being in a work capacity for  you is a different story.)

Same thing with the “culture” of inviting extra guests. I say we are doing “X” and “X” number of people maximum can attend. Not “X” plus one.

Their “culture” is very conveinient because it assumes other people are a commodity that will pay for that culture.

If  she was extended a kindness by being invited that is more then enough. An add on request is bold.

Don’t be reduced to a commodity. Just my opinion.

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SkyMan

Does the gf normally pay the yaya and was this outside the yaya's normal duties?  In other words, is the yaya live in 24/7? or were you away from home on vacation when she would  normally be off?  If that is the case the gf should have mentioned that before the vacation.  This is your first lesson in checking all the details beforehand.  How much will you charge me to do this job?  We'll see.  No, you'll tell me know or I'll get someone else to do it.

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yee
On 3/4/2018 at 6:26 PM, Travis said:

I took the girlfriend and the nanny on vacation recently. I paid for lodging in a nice resort, food fast boat etc. The island that we went to is the nannys home island.  she hasn't been able to visit there for 10 years so it was extra special for her.  when we get back to cebu my girlfriend wants me to pay the nanny a thousand pesos which i thought was it a little strange considering I spent a ton of money on rhe trip. 

Does this sound normal to you guys or this is sound like i got taken? 

It's not like it was a whole bunch of money but it's kind of the principle that hit me in the gut

Of the bat, I can say this is inappropriate if the child is not yours - if it's a demand.

If it's a request for you to give some sort of tip, then she probably just thinks you have some extra 1k you wanna get rid of. If that's the case, could've been shut down with an easy "No, babe."

It's not a culture ek-ek. Culture here is almost same as any other country. What's appropriate is kind of universal. If you're dating someone you think is not too aware of appropriateness (is that a word?) then you may want to educate her, kindly. 

 

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davehud

Sounds like the GF comes with a bit of baggage. A child, a yaya, and yaya's child. A gazillion women in the PI and you can't find one with less problems...

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TequilaSunset

Tough crowd, glad I don't make any mistakes (other than this post!) :P

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Davaoeno
1 hour ago, TequilaSunset said:

Tough crowd, glad I don't make any mistakes (other than this post!) :P

It is easy for me to find people who will tell me that I am a genius and doing everything right in my life . . It is much harder for me to find people who are willing to tell me how they truthfully react to my situation and what I have posted here .

Sometimes i accept the advice, sometimes I reject it . But I always appreciate people giving their opinions.  

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Flakes

Travis i bet ur gf was upset about u playing the nanny.

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sugbu777
On ‎3‎/‎4‎/‎2018 at 8:53 PM, oztony said:

Did she perform her duties during this trip ?

That's what I was thinking. If she is performing her job while on the trip, then she should be paid.

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Headshot
30 minutes ago, sugbu777 said:

That's what I was thinking. If she is performing her job while on the trip, then she should be paid.

Yes ... by the GF.

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