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How to Avoid Being Murdered if You're a Foreigner in the Philippines

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M.C.A.
16 hours ago, musicman666 said:

Personally my main defence now is to have zero casual relations with locals ...can’t be bothered with trying to run the gauntlet of not inadvertently pissing off their fragile egos ...from my own perspective it’s really no loss.

Drinking is the number way to get killed here or stay out late at night, in our municipality two guys were stabbed to death with a bolo knife one had his heart taken out (local on local violence) over food teasing and the other killed his buddy over bragging about doing  his wife while he working another provincial area, there was one other but I forgot what happened.  

Some examples of what I've gone through:  I got after brother in-law next door for throwing rocks on our house late at night, he'd been doing this every blue moon, he gets a kick out of bulling us but we have kids and he's been doing this for a decade so I had enough of the understanding and  I bitched him out real good so the entire neighborhood could hear me and he came out with his live in woman and a sword he was gonna stab me but a lady that was visiting us took out a huge knife from her purse... Lol I didn't know this until he had shoved the sword into the ground even more angry so I looked back the lady had the knife out and neighbor was also watching.

I've lost count on how many drunks got angry and running up and down the road with bolo knifes chasing people, good thing the gate was shut, in-laws get into arguments bring out the bolo knifes start hacking up their banana trees screaming complete insanity.

When I did drink with my Philippine neighbors they told me that they can never let a bad encounter go so once he has been made angry he will never forget and he won't let it go so eventually you'll be dealing with revenge, I mentioned to him I've had fights with friends but it's let go immediately once it's over but apparently he didn't' get it and so there's no forgiveness, they smile but eventually they will get even.

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Supple Steve
3 hours ago, smokey said:

So i am confused if they smile your not going to be killed but if you smile back you might get killed???

If you smile back and show your teeth, they have been known to attack on site! lol

 

I don't think I explained myself properly.  I hang out with locals every single day, but to think that a smile equals a good person (as many Filipinos do) is ludicrous.  After living here for 7 years, I have no local friends that are of the smiling, friendly type....most of those people are idiots.   And I'm of the belief that most foreigners get killed because they hang out with idiots.  But to each, his own.  

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Paddy
1 hour ago, M.C.A. said:

I've lost count on how many drunks got angry and running up and down the road with bolo knifes chasing people, good thing the gate was shut, in-laws get into arguments bring out the bolo knifes start hacking up their banana trees screaming complete insanity.

Even in the west, the veneer of civilization can be pretty thin. In the Philippines, it appears that veneer is also quite brittle (and it could be an interesting discussion to determine why that should be the case). The types of behaviors listed by M.C.A. are  not unknown in my village also (including my neighbor, who used to get drunk and take angry potshots at people, eventually being shot and killed himself). 

We need to know when to join in and when to slip quietly away. Personally, I'd prefer to be neither the provocation for, nor target of, such behavior.

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smokey

we have had a share of problems once two as my wife calls them bench boys always shinning a bench sit across the street I come out they said hey give us money ... I said nothing they stand up walk up to our property line give us money and we will go away... I went inside my wife takes her cannon goes out they leave she said something to them... Dear what did you say .... I told them you better watch out adala clan don't like your bullshit ,,, we don't give shit to no one and expect no shit in returne  

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delancey

The entire subject is very confusing. On a basic level Filipino can be very easy going and imo the nicest people in the world.

The few I interact with are outstanding individuals.

When situations get complex or you accidentally hit a nerve with whatever insecurities they have they simply do not process internal discomfort too good!!!

They turn their failings into being uncomfortable with you IE: they can owe you money and then hate you because they can’t pay it back and so they are now internally uncomfortable and you committed the sin of bringing up the debt! It’s your fault!

It’s an internal discomort thing about feeling inferior combined with poor skills at dealing with frustration, anger, embarrasment, whatever...you get the point.

Conversely the ones with college degrees and well paid act much more open minded and far far  far more balanced. Same with some more modest families that are not dirt insecure poor.

I think of how they make 6 children on P4K a month and all the issues that go with it. That food insecurity, constant poverty, lack of educational oportunities does not exactly bode well for reasoning skills. Very fagile very insecure. 

My neighbor is just not going to say, “ yeah I’m a charity case that depends on my OFW sister to feed me and I have four children I can’t afford”. They are going to walk around insecure instead.

Snowflake note: just my opinion, I am just thinking out loud and know I am not an expert. Thanks.

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smokey
4 minutes ago, delancey said:

The entire subject is very confusing. On a basic level Filipino can be very easy going and imo the nicest people in the world.

The few I interact with are outstanding individuals.

When situations get complex or you accidentally hit a nerve with whatever insecurities they have they simply do not process internal discomfort too good!!!

They turn their failings into being uncomfortable with you IE: they can owe you money and then hate you because they can’t pay it back and so they are now internally uncomfortable and you committed the sin of bringing up the debt! It’s your fault!

It’s an internal discomort thing about feeling inferior combined with poor skills at dealing with frustration, anger, embarrasment, whatever...you get the point.

Conversely the ones with college degrees and well paid act much more open minded and far far  far more balanced. Same with some more modest families that are not dirt insecure poor.

I think of how they make 6 children on P4K a month and all the issues that go with it. That food insecurity, constant poverty, lack of educational oportunities does not exactly bode well for reasoning skills. Very fagile very insecure. 

My neighbor is just not going to say, “ yeah I’m a charity case that depends on my OFW sister to feed me and I have four children I can’t afford”. They are going to walk around insecure instead.

Snowflake note: just my opinion, I am just thinking out loud and know I am not an expert. Thanks.

kind of like telling a welfare receiver this is your money and then giving them hell for spending it on dope 

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shadow

Oh gosh. After 1 am, and I am home once again after spending the entire evening with smiling locals drinking Red Horse. Been doing it for years, great people. I must be an idiot magician.  

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Travis

Hmmm red Horse?

 

It sounds good. 

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Flakes

Bullet proof vest?

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musicman666
8 hours ago, shadow said:

Oh gosh. After 1 am, and I am home once again after spending the entire evening with smiling locals drinking Red Horse. Been doing it for years, great people. I must be an idiot magician.  

It’s like watching someone playing Russian roulette ....

Edited by musicman666
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Travis
Just now, musicman666 said:

It’s like watching someone playing Russian roulette ....fortunately this gun has a lot more chambers.

Really? You worry about drinking with locals that much??

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musicman666
5 minutes ago, Travis said:

Really? You worry about drinking with locals that much??

Lol....I have some stories that might illuminate my point ...how long have you stayed in the phillipines?

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shadow

My first 5 years here I had problems dealing with and understanding the locals. My second 5 years, not so much. The last 5 years, only one time has there been a problem with a very drunken local. I did not back down. Before the night was over we became friends, and we still party together and laugh about it several years later.

 

I have far more problems with the expat populace than I ever have had with the locals. The expat populace seems to have a very large percentage of backstabbing, rumor mongering pussies.

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Travis
Just now, musicman666 said:

Lol....I have some stories that might illuminate my point ...how long have you stayed in the phillipines?

I would love to hear the stories

 

Exactly zero days. 

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Travis
Just now, shadow said:

My first 5 years here I had problems dealing with and understanding the locals. My second 5 years, not so much. The last 5 years, only one time has there been a problem with a very drunken local. I did not back down. Before the night was over we became friends, and we still party together and laugh about it several years later.

 

I have far more problems with the expat populace than I ever have had with the locals. The expat populace seems to have a very large percentage of backstabbing, rumor mongering pussies.

I will drink with you Shadow. 

 

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