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Salty Dog

Do As I Say, Not As I Did...

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Salty Dog

I see many members giving dating and marriage advice to newbies.

 

I was wondering how many of you followed your own advise when it came to things like:

 

1. Getting a copy of her birth certificate before you started dating. Or even just looked at her ID.

2. Didn't take her to nice hotel and restaurant to show off.

3. Getting a copy of a CENOMAR before getting serious.

4. Never, ever gave her any money.

5. Didn't visit the family.

6. Didn't spend any money on the family if you did visit them.

7. Had unprotected sex.

8. Only wanted a virgin.

9. Told her you would take her away back to your home country.

10. Never took her back to your home country.

11. Wouldn't date a Filipina with a child.

12. Wouldn't date a Filipina who had been married.

13. Wouldn't date a Filipina who didn't have a good job.

14. Never, ever lied to her.

15. Weren't still legally married to your wife back home.

16. Didn't tell her your financial situation. Be it good, or bad.

17. Provide for her after your death and if not, did you tell her she would be on her own.

18. Told her you couldn't have children or that you didn't want them.

19. Had children just because she wanted them.

20. Let relatives live with you.

 

I could go on and on. These are things I see mentioned more often. I'm not suggesting that you answer all the examples. If you realize that you may or may not have done some of them, maybe you can share YOUR personal experience.

 

I know there are members who have been married for many years to Filipinas closer to their age. While I commend you, I'm not sure your dating experiences from the the 1970s-1990s when you were a young buck would be very applicable to most current members. After all, it was a totally different world back then and courting habits of a young man in his 20s might not be all that applicable to a member in his 40s-70s who has been through it all in the past.

 

Let's try and keep this thread civil. I know, fat chance of that happening. I'm asking if you might share what you did or didn't do. Not for you to rag on others for what they posted. If you agree or disagree with something you read, tell us why, in a (cough cough), respectful manner.

 

Just remember, Big Brother is watching...

 

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USMC-Retired

Ah hell I just winged it.  Easier to tell others what to do.  Instincts lead me to my conclusions yet I had been single for many years and in the dating scene when I arrived.  Also much younger than most when I arrived. 

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Salty Dog

Here's a few I forgot to mention.

 

Did you come to the Philippines to meet a Filipina you had been corresponding with and ended up marrying her.

 

Did you marry the 1st Filipina you met or dated...

 

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to_dave007

My score was 15 of the "don't do's".  Shouldn't I be dead or broke already?

Might have married the first Filipina I ever dated as well.. if the darlin' wasn't married already and so good at keeping secrets.  But that's a book for another day.

Edited by to_dave007
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Salty Dog
My score was 15 of the "don't do's".  Shouldn't I be dead or broke already?
Might have married the first Filipina I ever dated as well.. if the darlin' wasn't married already and so good at keeping secrets.  But that's a book for another day.


It's hard to say if some are right, or wrong. If I had to count what many members say to do and not to do, I have also failed miserably...

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to_dave007
12 hours ago, Salty Dog said:

I have also failed miserably...

That's how I feel about marriage #1 and #2..  Marriage #3 can't be any worse.  and F%^k it.. I'm an optimist.

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to_dave007

 

13 hours ago, Salty Dog said:

3. Getting a copy of a CENOMAR before getting serious.

Just chuckling to myself about this one.  Yep.. it's great advice.  But no.. I didn't request CENOMAR until we were getting married, and by that time we already had 2 kids.

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Salty Dog
 

Just chuckling to myself about this one.  Yep.. it's great advice.  But no.. I didn't request CENOMAR until we were getting married, and by that time we already had 2 kids.

 

I guess that answers the question about unprotected sex...

 

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TequilaSunset

Told her I could not have kids... been proudly shooting blanks since 1994 :D 

That's enough fodder... 

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Topper
57 minutes ago, TequilaSunset said:

Told her I could not have kids... been proudly shooting blanks since 1994 :D 

That's enough fodder... 

Yeah, me too. But I did manage to meet a lovely lady who didn't have a problem with it. Been married to the woman for 12 years now. And YES!, I'm still in love with her. It was funny when she had to explain it to her family when they kept asking her when she is going to have kids. I told her to tell them that it was like when you shoot a handgun, lots of smoke, noise, and flame...but no bullet. They understood that.

Edited by Topper
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Soupeod
That's how I feel about marriage #1 and #2..  Marriage #3 can't be any worse.  and F%^k it.. I'm an optimist.


Me too


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M.C.A.

I was a player and was TAD to the USNS Chauvenet for 6 months out of the year, but finally ran into a cutie that I didn't want or need to look further she was so hot but due to my short time here and I couldn't get stationed in Subic I let her go.

No matter what girl I ran into the family was always involved, never had any money it was a never ending constant issue.  But married a Philippine lady who was divorced in WA state she wanted kids and we also couldn't have them, she had an operation to tie her tubes after failed pregnancy, we adopted kids but I was still working and so we never really bonded that well ... after my adopted daughter had our grand kids, I sure bonded with both of them and wouldn't change it for the world and I was always against having children.

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NOSOCALPINOY

We had a 6 yr long distance courtship (hanky panky - 0). When we finally got married I was 39 and she 24. We never had any children, but we were OK with it.

We've since retired in the Philippines 19 yrs ago and have been married now for 29 yrs and enjoying our retirement lifestyle. Can't ask for anything more. Life is grand when a plan comes together with a little luck, because the good life isn't always what we all expect it to be, sometimes it just happens. 

Edited by NOSOCALPINOY
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Mandingo
21 hours ago, Salty Dog said:

I see many members giving dating and marriage advice to newbies.

 

I was wondering how many of you followed your own advise when it came to things like:

 

1. Getting a copy of her birth certificate before you started dating. Or even just looked at her ID.

     No. I knew she was over (well over I might add) 21.

2. Didn't take her to nice hotel and restaurant to show off.

    Took her to many places she thought were nice She grew up in the mountains so most places we went were luxurious  to her.

3. Getting a copy of a CENOMAR before getting serious.

    No

4. Never, ever gave her any money.

    Gave her money.

5. Didn't visit the family.

    Spent time with her family in Manila and Leyte. Did the dinner and buy groceries thing.

6. Didn't spend any money on the family if you did visit them.

    I spent on them. 

7. Had unprotected sex.

    Yes :)

8. Only wanted a virgin.

    No. I could care less about a virgin. 

9. Told her you would take her away back to your home country.

    Yes

10. Never took her back to your home country.

    Brought her over as soon as I could and best decision I ever made. 

11. Wouldn't date a Filipina with a child.

    I would and don't care if they have a child. 

12. Wouldn't date a Filipina who had been married.

    No. Don't care as long as they are a good person. 

13. Wouldn't date a Filipina who didn't have a good job.

     I would as most jobs are crap there. 

14. Never, ever lied to her.

     I have lied. "No hun, that dress does not make your ass look big" :)

15. Weren't still legally married to your wife back home.

      No. I was never married prior to her. 

16. Didn't tell her your financial situation. Be it good, or bad.

     No. Laid it all out for her.

17. Provide for her after your death and if not, did you tell her she would be on her own.

      Yes. Home, SS, pension, 401K, few stocks and life insurance. 

18. Told her you couldn't have children or that you didn't want them.

    I can have too old now and don't want. Grandkids/God Kids are fine. 

19. Had children just because she wanted them.

     No. She wanted but I stood my ground. 

20. Let relatives live with you.

     Both her adult age sons did when they first arrived to the U.S. until I put them to work and now they have their own accommodations. 

 

I could go on and on. These are things I see mentioned more often. I'm not suggesting that you answer all the examples. If you realize that you may or may not have done some of them, maybe you can share YOUR personal experience.

 

I know there are members who have been married for many years to Filipinas closer to their age. While I commend you, I'm not sure your dating experiences from the the 1970s-1990s when you were a young buck would be very applicable to most current members. After all, it was a totally different world back then and courting habits of a young man in his 20s might not be all that applicable to a member in his 40s-70s who has been through it all in the past.

 

Let's try and keep this thread civil. I know, fat chance of that happening. I'm asking if you might share what you did or didn't do. Not for you to rag on others for what they posted. If you agree or disagree with something you read, tell us why, in a (cough cough), respectful manner.

 

Just remember, Big Brother is watching...emoji2.png

 

Sent from my SM-T817V using Tapatalk

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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ex231

I see many members giving dating and marriage advice to newbies.

 

I was wondering how many of you followed your own advise when it came to things like:

 

1. Getting a copy of her birth certificate before you started dating. Or even just looked at her ID. She looked young, so yep.

2. Didn't take her to nice hotel and restaurant to show off. Nope

3. Getting a copy of a CENOMAR before getting serious. No need, see #8

4. Never, ever gave her any money. Nope

5. Didn't visit the family. I did and they were great.

6. Didn't spend any money on the family if you did visit them. Nope

7. Had unprotected sex. Yep, see #8

8. Only wanted a virgin. Never thought of the possibility but got one anyway.

9. Told her you would take her away back to your home country. Told her I wouldn't but I did.

10. Never took her back to your home country. She's in the US now.

11. Wouldn't date a Filipina with a child. I did briefly but knew it wasn't going anywhere because of that.

12. Wouldn't date a Filipina who had been married. I did but that was before I found out about the consequences. 

13. Wouldn't date a Filipina who didn't have a good job. Preferred she didn't work.

14. Never, ever lied to her. Nope

15. Weren't still legally married to your wife back home. Nope

16. Didn't tell her your financial situation. Be it good, or bad. Told her everything when I thought the time was right.

17. Provide for her after your death and if not, did you tell her she would be on her own. Yep

18. Told her you couldn't have children or that you didn't want them. Yep

19. Had children just because she wanted them. Nope

20. Let relatives live with you. Nope ... but her sister is kind of hot so I might LOL

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