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Lost

Is having children worth it?

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Lost

It seems like many people from my generation are choosing not to have children due to the the cost, time, required sacrifices, etc. Most people with kids say it's the best thing that ever happened to them. But of course nobody wants to admit to regretting their offspring, so I'm not sure it's credible. On the other hand, the thought of being old and childless seems depressing as f&*#.  It seems like people on both sides are biased.

 

Anyone have advice? Any older guys here without kids?

 

Fell free to throw in any general parenting advice as well, like giving birth in USA vs Ph., money considerations, etc.

 

 

(Sorry if wrong forum, wasn't sure where to put this.)

Edited by Lost

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Skywalker

 

 

Anyone have advice?

 

Don't have kids.

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BossHog

Why not ask your parents and not us?

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broden

you should also ask yourself not just are you willing to give up what you feel you will give up.. and what will you gain

 

but also what kind of parent will you subject your child to... not everyone is cut out to raise a child

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Enuff

Take you friends out for drinks, providing they can find a proper babysitter.

 

Once drunk ask them if they regret having children.

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Semper paratus

The country and the Earth in general is already way over-populated. Why promote it ?

Personally I am 70+++ and I do not have kids and I do not regret it.

How many old farts here already have kids that they'll never likely even see graduate from high school ? Or even grade school ? Then what happens to these kids when you are dead ? There are enough "street children" now. We surely don't need any more.

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Jawny

The op leaves me with more questions than answers to provide. Not sure which generation is being referred to. There have been many generations where the issue of whether to have children, or not, has come up. This is a pretty old issue. It would make more sense to search on parenting websites for advice. Just my opinion.

 

No mention if the op is married or in a long term relationship. Makes a difference when parenting with two.

 

Also, if no indication where this child rearing will take place. Makes a difference if it in the Philippines or somewhere else.

 

Good luck

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USMC-Retired

If you have to ask then no.  

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SkyMan

If you decide you don't want kids, you will need to be very upfront with your gf that is the case and that could still be a problem.  She could say she's ok with not having kids but she might be thinking she'll change your mind later.  If you do decide to have them realize the RP is probably one of the cheapest places to have them as yayas are cheap and you don't really have to do a lot if you don't want to.  Don't have one if you don't want them or just because she wants them.  You need to want one too.  

 

not everyone is cut out to raise a child
Unless you know you are abusive or whatever I'd say anyone who actually wants a kid can be a good parent but if you aren't motivated to be a good parent it's best to opt out.

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ckfm

I have 3 kids, one with my Filipina. I don't want to have more and if I would be asked at my age 50 plus, I would say NO. Having kids ruines a relationship unless both really desperately want to have them. Unless you live full time in the Phils and give a shit what they are doing all day long and have somebody else take care of them, lol. It really changes the women, most of them turn into protecting tigresses and you are not on the inside. :wheel:

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HeyMike

Being a father is the greatest thing for me. An absolute joy. Mileages will vary.

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the.lone.gunman

I have 2 kids, absolutely no regrets, and I have 3 grandkids who are an absolute blast.

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Soarking

You don't have to have your own kids to enjoy them when you get old. I'm sure you have, (or will have) plenty of nieces and nephews to spoil and enjoy in your old age. Or perhaps your Filipina g/f has kids already.

 

Just don't be alone with them here in the Philippines.

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RogerDat

The children are a test of your fortitude, the grand and great grand kids are the reward of putting up with your own kids.

Adoption is also a possibility for some.

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Headshot

It seems like many people from my generation are choosing not to have children due to the the cost, time, required sacrifices, etc. Most people with kids say it's the best thing that ever happened to them. But of course nobody wants to admit to regretting their offspring, so I'm not sure it's credible. On the other hand, the thought of being old and childless seems depressing as f&*#.  It seems like people on both sides are biased.

 

Anyone have advice? Any older guys here without kids?

 

Fell free to throw in any general parenting advice as well, like giving birth in USA vs Ph., money considerations, etc.

 

 

(Sorry if wrong forum, wasn't sure where to put this.)

 

You have to look in your heart for the answer to that question ... NOT to the members of an online forum. I have a five-year-old daughter with my Filipina wife who I can't imagine life without, but there are those who will tell you that children will ruin your life. It all depends on YOU, and how YOU feel about children. It doesn't depend on how anybody else feels about it. Look to your heart.

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