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    • Paul

      New Members: Click Here   03/09/2017

      Hello. If you are a new member, and feel a bit apprehensive about posting in the "open" forums, or, just wish to get your "sea legs" prior to posting in the open forums, feel free to post anything you wish to talk about, in the Newbies Forum. No one will bother you, or give you any sort of grief. Everyone there is happy to help you get answers to your questions.

poby

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poby last won the day on September 23 2010

poby had the most liked content!

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1,628 Really bored when not online.

About poby

  • Rank
    Born to be mild

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  • Gender
    Male
  • Location
    small planet somewhere in the vicinity of Betelgeuse
  • My Blood Type
    No option.
  • Interests
    aka Cheap Ass Charlie

Philippines Experience

  • Philippines
    Current resident

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  1. If only it were possible to give this more than one like! Prohibition of alcohol failed dismally and yet "those who refuse to learn the lessons of history are doomed to repeat them" 99% of harm to drug users of all types is caused directly by the illegality. Thousands of lives and billions of dollars would be saved annually if all drugs were legalised. Not to mention the harder to quantify advantage of happier people. Most drugs are harmless if taken responsibly. And by responsibly, I mean don't take them every day or in vast quantities. But if you do, it's fine. You will most likely die which will improve society by having one less idiot in it, hopefully before he had a chance to breed.
  2. I agree 100% with Mr. Pink, his arguments are solid! (Apologies if someone already posted this and I missed it)
  3. Well based on the above definition, we will all be "stiffs" eventually. I just decided to start early
  4. I'm very much against tipping for all the reasons others have already stated. In addition it just makes life more complicated. It's one more decision you have to make as to how much to tip in a culture where tipping is, if not legally mandated, then culturally required. It's one of the reasons I haven't been to the USA more than twice. In Cebu I never tip anyone anywhere. The only possible exception was when I was staying in century hotel long term and xmas came around and decided to give the room boy a 500 peso present. (He called himself a "room boy" but I think he was over 50). Over the months I'd been staying there, he had been very helpful. But it was difficult to get him to accept my xmas present. He kept insisting it wasn't necessary. I feel it is important outside the USA to avoid tipping as much as possible so as to avoid the expectation of such creeping into the culture.
  5. Many years ago, I lived with an extremely intelligent woman for around 6 months. She had a Phd in 19th century french literature and a masters in psychology, (or could have been the other way round, don't recall.) She was smokin' hot, a demon in bed and fascinating to talk with. Oh, and absolutely unbearable to live with. The relationship was fantastic up until the day she moved in, after which it began a steep decline. Suddenly every problem she had was my fault and she felt it important to detail my numerous failings in great detail with constant daily reminders. I suspect those highly educated in psychology are the worst at relationships. That's when I learnt that intellectual compatibility is over rated in relationships and way down the list of what makes a relationship work.
  6. Yeah I phrased it poorly. I should have said " sex can get in the way of love". Also, everything I wrote is from a personal subjective perspective. I don't mean to say it applies to everyone, but only to my own feelings.
  7. 30 minutes should be fine on a sunday. Unless there's major roadworks or accident or something.
  8. Mrs and I have been cohabiting for nigh on 8 years and that time together has taught me so much about love. I've been married and divorced three times and had many failed live in relationships. I had got to the point where I really suspected that "true love everlasting" didn't exist outside fairy tales. I thought maybe what is normal is that after a few years when the early romantic and sexual love faded, couples just got bored with each other and yearned for the intense feelings of the beginning. The result too often being breaking up and falling in love again with someone new. That kind of made sense from an evolutionary perspective and seemed to match my prior experiences. Rinse and repeat. If Mrs had been a candidate in a computer matching algorithm, she wouldn't have made the first cut as we have very little in common on many levels. She's certainly not stupid but nowhere near my level of intelligence and her favorite movies too often revolve around serial killers, lacking interest in the more subtle elements of a well made film - especially if it lacked violence. She has zero interest in reading, which I thought so sad as she is missing out on some amazing books. And so on. And yet here we are 8 years later and I'm genuinely surprised to say our bond has never been stronger. It's like concrete that grows in strength with every passing year. I can literally say that each year together is better than the previous. Yeah we get bored with life sometimes but we always feel better bored together than bored apart. Being an introspective, thoughtful analytical type, I have often pondered on how we can be so close emotionally and yet so different in our interests. There is no question, our relationship works, but why does it works so well? My tentative conclusions are that sex gets in the way of love to a large degree. You can't really know if you love someone until you've spent enough years together for the whole sex thing to dry up and fade away. When sex rears it's ugly head, it totally messes with the mind and can create false feelings of love that can only be made real over large amounts of time together. Or not. Time together also increases the level of trust and security which is the bedrock of everlasting love. Really knowing deep inside that she will always have my back and will never leave me gives me a profound sense of comfort. Also, over time, I believe people can change in small ways that fit them together better. Sharp edges are worn down and they become more alike. But given our many differences, why does it work so incredibly well? I suspect it's because we are very compatible on an emotional level. We both need to show our loving feelings on a daily basis - even 8 years later. Our true compatibility lies in having the same desire to love and be loved by each other. And of course she laughs at my silly jokes - always a plus. I've never had a relationship last this long or feel so strong. I can't imagine life without her. Which worries me sometimes as I'm only 20 years older and I might live well into my 90's. I need her to live at least as long as I do. I don't want to think about a world without her by my side. We are so much part of each other. She might not be my natural soulmate, but with her by my side I feel richer than Bill Gates. I frequently remind myself to appreciate every day we have together as you never know when the sand will run out. All of our days are numbered and it's important to know how much you have and how lucky you are to have a life so sweet. I try not to take for granted that which I know is limited in supply. Life is precious but infinitely more so with her by my side.
  9. Real estate is pretty much the only thing that is cheaper in Philippines. But if even that, if you comparing apples with apples, it's not hugely cheaper. A western style of comfort and quality house in cebu is cheaper but not hugely cheaper than an equivalent in an average western country. Real estate varies massively country to country. e.g. cheap in New Zealand, insanely expensive in Australia. The equivalent of 8 million pesos buys a reasonable standard house in an urban area in New Zealand. The equivalent in cebu might cost around 4 million. In Australia, you looking at around 25 million or more. But leaving aside real estate costs, I would suggest Philippines is one of the more expensive places to live an equivalent quality of life as almost everything else costs more. Electricity is not cheap and those of us who abhor heat and humidity, must pay for running aircon 24/7. Philippines food sucks. Even filipinos will admit it once they experience other countries cuisines. Food is one of life's few great pleasures and not one that you want to economise on long term. Of course some things are cheaper (taxis, girls, mangos, etc) but overall, if you want to maintain a western equivalent lifestyle, you will likely be paying more for it in Philippines than back home.
  10. Only cheap if you own your house. Australia has some of the highest real estate costs in the world. Easy for a couple to live there on $1000 a month IF they aren't paying rent or a mortgage.
  11. We own property in Australia and Cebu and that being the case, we actually save money when we in Australia. Our total grocery/utilities/entertainment/car expenses (own car in both places too) etc are less than $1000 a month all in. But we spend about double that in Cebu because we strive to live the same quality of life which means buying imported grocery items which are absurdly expensive in Cebu. Groceries are dirt cheap and high quality in Australia compared to Philippines. e.g. 400 gram can of mixed beans is 80 pesos in metro ayala but only 27 pesos in aldi Australia. Broccoli, capsicum, cheese, corn... whatever, is very expensive in Philippines. Yeah you can eat like a local, live like a local and get by on a pittance like a local. But why would you want to?
  12. I'm a big fan of valium when used appropriately. About a year ago, I had a tax issue arise that I was entirely innocent of but had to scrounge up enough paperwork to prove it (OZ tax department, like most countries, operates on the guilty until proven innocent model). I was pretty stressed so went to my GP hoping he would give me this valium stuff I'd heard was good for this. He did. It worked. For the 2 weeks it took to sort out the issue, I never once had a problem sleeping, after popping 5mg. Soon as I got the all clear from the ATO, I stopped taking it. No side effects, no withdrawal. I'd used about about 20 of the bottle of 50 I'd been prescribed and have found it useful at times when I have had some minor anxiety or even just getting a bit of kip on a long flight. 5mg works. 10mg knocks me out solid. Much better than natural sleep as I don't toss and turn or wake at night, but rather, I'm dead to the world for a good 8 to 10 hours, and then wake up feeling fully rested. Wish I could take it every night but however useful, drugs should always be treated with respect, especially those with high addiction potential. Infrequent or occasional use is pretty safe. More than that is stupidly risky.
  13. I owned and ran the business (not the building), for a year around 2010 (along with a business partner) and in my most humble opinion (and that of many people I talked to), we did a reasonable job. I'm not really a good match for bar owner hence the business partner effectively ran it for me and we split the profits. My main reason for buying it was Mrs worked there and had recently been fired, the lease was up and I did a deal with Wes to take it over, so I could effectively fire the former owner (in retaliation). Ok not very mature admittedly... but how dare he fire my Mrs! A man's gotta stand up for his woman. After the year was up, we moved on and under the next owner, I think it went downhill. This is a subjective opinion of course but based on reports from a lot of erstwhile regulars, that the place became a whole lot less friendly and inviting and more than a few were either banned or swore never to return. I had previously had issues with the new owner so I wasn't at all surprised when the first thing he did was ban me which was probably a symbolic gesture as I had no intention of ever setting foot in there again while he was running it. I must admit to lacking the maturity not to enjoy a certain degree of schadenfreude on hearing of the declining numbers of clientele and later to subsequent events that almost had me believing in karma. Because I didn't like the guy, and I thought he was ruining an institution. Sounds like it's not gonna get any better under the latest owner. Sad really, It's been a goto expat place since 1978.
  14. When I buy stuff with bitcoin, it's generally stuff I don't want the government to be able to trace back to me. But it's hard to buy bitcoins without providing all sorts of personal data. I have some accounts at a couple of Aussie bitcoin brokers that have all my personal data. Not anonymous but it's very easy to buy. I make my bitcoins untraceable by sending them to a laundry to be washed and from there to my offline wallet which of course is completely anonymous with no way of connecting it to myself. The beauty of an offline wallet is that you can secure it with a 13 word passphrase after which you can delete all traces of the wallet from your computer. Then when you want to use your bitcoins, you can regenerate your wallet with the passphrase you memorised. In theory you can carry around millions of dollars in your head as long as your don't forget the passphrase.
  15. It's a very good question to ask oneself and for many I think the answer does not come quickly. Nor should it as it's a life changing decision that can't be undone (at least not past a certain point). My partner wants kids a lot more than I do, but nonetheless after careful consideration, I do want them to happen. My reasons being: 1. It would make Mrs happy and I've no doubt she would be an awesome mother. 2. I'm bored. Been bored since I retired 12 years ago. Got plenty of money but nothing interesting to spend it on. Children would be sometimes entertaining, sometimes, annoying, sometimes damn stressful but overall definitely interesting and help to pass the time. They would be schooled in Philippines and Australia, hopefully to get the best of each culture. I like to think I could be a good father but I really don't know. For sure I would be nothing like my own father because I am nothing like my own father. Which suggests I might be a good one. But then it takes two to tango. Hard to be a good father to a bad kid and some kids are just born bad I think. You roll the dice and you live with what you get because you can't send'm back. Other than in an emergency, I will not be changing diapers. I have changed close to 3000 diapers in my life (daughter from 2nd marriage) and that's enough. But Mrs is totally fine with that so not a problem. This assumes we can have children. After 7 years of cohabitation, there's been no sign of the stork. We have both been tested and her plumbing is fine as is my junk so we fall into the 10% category of unexplained infertility. We are about to embark on IVF which has around a 40% success rate per cycle. It costs around $5000 each time and I have committed myself to a maximum of three cycles. If it doesn't work we will leave it up to nature and if nature ultimately fails us, well there are certainly advantages to being childless so we will be fine.